this post was submitted on 17 Mar 2026
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I drink coffee. If someone would want to chat with me over coffee but then drinks water, I wouldn't care one bit. If you cannot figure this out with your own mom, then I am really not sure what to think about that relationship.
You're under the impression the mom was judging her? It is a very normal human tendency to want to mirror others. That's all this is.
I never said the mom was judging her. I rather see it she cannot even approach her own mom to ask if it is ok to sit and not drink coffee. Or likewise her mom wondering why her daughter doesn't want to sit with her when she drinks coffee. I don't know, just overall seems a very artificial and unlikely situation to me.
I don't see it that way at all. The two wanted to sit together, the daughter subconsciously needed to mirror her mother, so she did. It doesn't say anything about my relationship with friends I used to hang out with, that I smoked cigarettes with "socially". I never asked them if I could not smoke, they never pressured me to smoke in any way. I simply had an instinct to do what they were doing. I felt more comfortable that way. I've dated women who hated beer but when surrounded by people drinking beer, they would drink half of one. I think this kind of thing is extremely common. Peer pressure isn't always overt, as in someone suggesting someone do something others are doing.