this post was submitted on 27 Jan 2026
632 points (99.7% liked)

Not The Onion

19509 readers
1667 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] brianary@lemmy.zip 44 points 22 hours ago (3 children)

Conservatives don't assimilate into American society.

[–] IronBird@lemmy.world 13 points 20 hours ago (2 children)

really have to stop calling them conservatives, they're regressives clearly

[–] coffee_nutcase207@lemmy.world 3 points 19 hours ago

Remember that old fad of theirs were they called us the "regressive left".

These people are so fucking disingenuous.

[–] hector@lemmy.today 1 points 19 hours ago

I prefer degeneratives.

[–] BetaBlake@lemmy.world 14 points 21 hours ago

They're whole ethos is antisocial. They are obstinent toddlers who stomp their feet and fold their arms and think it's funny to make other people mad.

[–] Soleos@lemmy.world 1 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

The USA is not a monolith. The lines and features have probably shifted, but the idea of Colin Woodward's "American Nations" rings quite true today.

[–] wolframhydroxide@sh.itjust.works 8 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

You're missing the joke. One of the chief conservative complaints about immigrants is that "they don't assimilate into american society".

[–] Soleos@lemmy.world 1 points 16 hours ago (2 children)

Yes, I got the joke. And I was suggesting that Americans have always been on about other Americans not assimilating into their American culture. I also just find jokes about fascists being hypocritical or contradictory are no longer funny when the assumption that it's an indication of foolish lack of self-awareness no longer holds because double-think is the active goal.

[–] wolframhydroxide@sh.itjust.works 1 points 13 hours ago

Fair enough, I suppose

[–] brianary@lemmy.zip 1 points 15 hours ago

I guess I'd say that the joke is for us and not them, but I'd also argue that they genuinely don't assimilate, probably to a much greater degree than any other demographic.