this post was submitted on 13 Jan 2026
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No, it's definitely the culture telling most women they need to look pretty. Most women don't have someone constantly saying, "gee you're ugly without makeup". It's just implied by marketing and campaigns and Hollywood glamour expectations the culture soaks up.
I don't know what other women hear, but I get a lot of "you look tired today" when we don't wear make up - and it was worse before it started Botox/filler. I don't think people even know that they are pushing the culture.
Who sets those expectations? I hope it's not your boss, personally telling you to wear makeup. I hope it's not a husband or SO telling you you need to wear makeup to be presentable.
I'd say it's very obvious that the flippant comments are informed by culture, and not yours or their personally set expectations. (I mean, unless you have an asshole boss that does try to set expectations, but I'm not hearing that in what was said so far)
I'm my boss and my husband prefers no makeup, so I'm in the clear there. 😁
I hear it from clients, store clerks, or other random people I interact with. It's the new "you should smile more" for me.
Thats only because there's a big difference between no make up and make up. Makeup also specifically hides signs of being tired. Its a matter of expectation, but one that you set yourself.
I don't know your experience with makeup, being tired and aging... I get the sense that people (often men) cannot tell the difference between tired and aging. Makeup hides both. I don't get the comments often from women very often. So I am assuming they are able to see the nuance (or have the tact to not say something).
Men dont actively think about it usually. There should be signs we learn of those around us that show when they are tired or any other state, but if a woman hides those signs with makeup, men will just assume makeup equals not tired and no makeup equals tired.
I guess that could be me though and not men in general.
You misread the parent comment. They only struck through half of the word cultural, to leave "cult".
Yea that's is still mental illness.
Wanting to fit in with people you don't associate with is kind of weird to begin with. Risking your health and welfare so that you can look like a burn victim is a fucking bizarre bit of mental calculus that seems to indicate something is miswired.
I agree the plastic surgery stuff is just crazy. Though the unrealistic beauty standards are definitely a cultural thing. It's only ever going to be a cultural thing under capitalism, whre what ever expectation, realistic or not, that is most 'pretty' will be used in advertisements. It basically guarantees saturation of unrealistic expectations.