this post was submitted on 08 Jan 2026
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Memes of Production
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I'll never forget a comment I read in a green text somewhere about transmasc: "Welcome to the Suck, brother. Everyone has already forgotten about you."
I think it was supposed to be a jab about how society doesnt care about men. But society is run by men so it would seem its our own damn fault.
We're invisible for being transgender men, not for just being men. But because we don't fit a specific viewpoint and cannot be used advantageously by transphobes unless it is about us "mutilating" our bodies, and thus we are highly invisible in trans and queer spaces alike. That's what that meme meant. We also don't get a ton of representation in media or even in studies.
For some men, it's definitely self-inflicted. The rest of us have to deal with their bullshit.
It's definitely weird. I've never felt ignored, overlooked, etc. Doctors listen to me. Professionals in my circles take my words as professional. Women don't get that same experience. I can't fathom how men can say they're persecuted with a straight face unless they literally brought it on themselves through arguably intentional means.
There’s a lot of expectations of men - a lot of them self-inflicted - and if you don’t feel you can live up to them it sucks.
But you’re right about the other stuff. The number of times I’ve watched a mediocre man get credit for rephrasing an idea that a woman said not ten seconds earlier would be a lot of nickels.
Privilege is just problems you don't have. It's an absence. That's difficult to feel without active effort.
uhh, there's a lot of good and valid discourse about cis men and their perceptions and opinions here. and i think that comment was probably about the cis or cis-passing male experience
but there's some unique aspects to being transmasc that suck and feel comparable to being bisexual, with both of us kind of being invisible to society (frequently, anyways; not claiming this applies 100% of the time)
it seems like there's a lower bar to passing for trans men (on average, again); this is, generally speaking, a positive in a transphobic society. but it can also be very lonely and isolating, in ways. it's hard to be really known and a lot of people don't even know trans men exist
like i've thought about this, and there's just not a good way to advertise that you're a trans man. if i'm flying the trans flag colors, people think i'm a pre-transition transfem LOL we don't have a cohesive and meme-y culture of cat ears and thigh highs, there's nothing i can wear that's like "oh that guy's trans(masc)"
i mean, i guess i could take my shirt off, but i don't even think most people would clock me 💀
anyways i'm just kind of rambling now. but i thought it would be good to have some actual transmasc input on this post lol
If you could unilaterally embed something into the cultural consciousness as being distinctively transmasc culture (similar on scale and arbitrariness as cat ears and programming socks), what would you pick?
I found your comparison to bisexuality interesting, given that some of the things that I've seen posited as being bi culture are super arbitrary in a way that makes it abundantly clear that the only true motif of bi culture is desperately trying to claim whatever we can as bi culture, to give ourselves a sense of relevance and being seen (aside from dual wielding daggers, that is. That's obviously bi culture)
lmfao god, i'm like the worst guy to ask, my style leans heavily pink/flowery/femme. maybe a symbol one could get tattoed on them?
but i'm thinking about the way my transmasc (masc) friends and how they dress and all of it is just... ugh LOL i hate typical men's fashion
It is good to have. An angle I never thought. I just know I got that quote from 4chan so there could be some very incel type intentions behind that comment considering the source.
@Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world :
Basically, there are two kinds of men : those who are succeeding at the things they are trying to achieve, and the rest. If you're part of the first group, congrats! You're privvy to the privilage and etc and you are part of the "gender society appreciates". If you're part of the rest, you're a fucking awful failure , shut up, fuck off, and die already, no one cares and no one will help you until you help yourself.
So then get therapy and help yourself, idk what to tell you
Therapy can help with individual problems, but is a poor salve for the harms caused by systemic problems.
It wont fix systemic problems but it will give you the tools to work through them without taking your problems out on others and contributing to the abusive systems.
We all suffer from system-level problems and yet some are well-adjusted (as well asnthey can be) and some are not.
If not therapy, what bridges this gap?
Actually trans women receive more attention by being sexualized and fetichized by men, or with memes about how she's seen by men, just misoginy, not "good attention" and every woman goes through this
Okay but this comment is about trans men. Its not about women at all.