The forced takeover of Greenland would harm NATO’s ability to preserve trust between its member nations. The North Atlantic Treaty contains Article 5, which requires member states to defend each other, but this provision would become ineffective when the United States faces an attack. The NATO allies would need to decide between taking action against Washington or giving up their commitment to collective defense.

This would become the point at which I would start seriously considering moving to a site on which I could build a bomb shelter, or at least stockpile long-term quantities of non-perishable food and survival supplies. Starting WWIII for fucking Greenland is beyond any description of surreal insanity I can feasibly elucidate. It would take a poem, or a song.