this post was submitted on 18 Dec 2025
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Programmer Humor

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[–] jubilationtcornpone@sh.itjust.works 43 points 18 hours ago (2 children)
/*
By all accounts, the logic in this method shouldn't work. And yet it does. We do not know why. It makes no sense whatsoever. It took three weeks and numerous offerings to the programming gods, including using one of the junior devs as a human sacrifice, to unlock this knowledge. DO NOT LET HIS VIOLENT AND UNTIMELY DEATH BE IN VAIN! Touch this at your own peril.
--jubilationtcornpone 12/17/25
*/
public async Task<IResult> CalculateResultAsync()
{
     // Some ass backwards yet miraculously functional logic.
}
[–] pinball_wizard@lemmy.zip 1 points 4 hours ago

--jubilationtcornpone

He led the retreat that saved our town!

[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 4 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

That long-ass horizontal scroll bar reminds me of how I used to put unfindable easter eggs into my Visual Basic apps. I would have amusing little messages pop up from time to time in message boxes. To prevent anyone from just searching for the exact text in the message box, I would reduce it to a series of concatenated Chr() statements and then I would put like 200 characters of whitespace in front of the message box call. The only way anybody would spot it would be if they noticed the horizontal scroll bar this produced and nobody ever did.

At least that's my theory. It's also possible that nobody ever used the software that I produced.

[–] Hudell@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 4 hours ago

A friend of mine used to teach coding decades ago and one story I'll never forget is about the student who had an assignment that asked for a "for" loop to be used, but they didn't quite know how to use it so they just wrote a broken loop there and then hid a "while" loop at the far end of the line.

Code compiled, had a "for" loop and had the right output.