this post was submitted on 10 Nov 2025
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I wonder how they spend all that ragebait π€
βΊοΈ
I hear they thresh the rage, comb it to make the fibers more pliable, then spin it into a golden flax-colored thread, finer than all the gold in the land. They take those in bundles of 27 magic golden strings, and braid 3 strings together into cords, then braid 3 cords together into a magical golden rage rope. Then they throw that over a rafter, tie the rope around their neck, and stand on a chair and edge themselves for an hour or so until they either fall and end their pointless existence, or whimper out yet another unsatisfying autoerotic asphyxiation orgasm as they hide the shame of their lives for a brief moment under a momentary wash of endorphins.
But sometimes they take the golden rope and weave in flowers make it into a lovely bridle for a magical steed that will take them to meet the fair princess in yonder castle!