this post was submitted on 03 Nov 2025
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My partner offered to do my makeup today. I was excited both because she's been iffy on the whole transition thing and because she's very good at doing her own makeup and I was excited to get some instruction.

I've always thought I look young for my age and fairly attractive (if you're into mountain men) so I was cautiously optimistic about the results. But when she was done I looked in the mirror and my first thought was: shit, I hope Napoleon comes through that door and puts me out of my misery. I looked like an old french duke or a sad theatre queen in a Christmas pantomime.

Without the makeup I looked around 5 years younger than my age, but with it I looked easily 25 years older. My eyelids especially looked like poorly tanned leather. I know estrogen is amazing for your skin, but Jesus Christ does it have some heavy fucking lifting to do.

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That's good to know. I'm from a place with almost no gender expression (ie men and women basically dress the same and hang out in mixed groups and kinda look the same) and the only woman in my immediate family didn't ever wear makeup. So it's all pretty unfamiliar to me.