this post was submitted on 30 Oct 2025
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Perimenopause
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A supportive space for women and men navigating perimenopause, man-opause, menopause, hormonal changes, and reclaiming balance in mind, body, and confidence. Share experiences, wellness tips, and real talk about the transitions no one prepares us for.
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This is exactly what my wife has been (is) experiencing for about a year now. She's "too young" apparently, according to our doctor(s).
So, if it's cool with y'all, I'll hang out for some tips on how to best support her.
It's more than okay if you hang out with us! Welcome to the world of Perimenopause. And her case sounds all too familiar. If you don't mind, how old is she at this time?
TY!
She's 43.
My menopause (not peri but the actual thing) started at 42. So did my mom’s. If your wife has that opportunity, she should ask her mom/women in her family when they started going through it. She is not too young. Doctors don’t know shit about perimenopause because it’s not studied extensively, and they don’t cover it well enough in med school.
In Western Europe, the MEDIAN age for menaupose is 51, and perimenaupose has a MEDIAN length of 7 years.
She's not too young. She's very close to the median.
Oh, that's useful to know.
I wonder if it's miscommunication in some form. 'Too young' for menopause, bang on for perimenopause onset.
Yes, some doctor's only look at menopause and don't treat peri because they don't understand it. She should definitely see another physician.
Agreed. I hope she see's another Dr. a soon as possible. MarieMarion, what part of Western Europe are you in? What country has a MEDIAN age?
I'm in France, but I don't think I understand your question :)
Oh, by MEDIAN do you mean the general consensus or the "standard"? I think that's what you meant.
It means the age when 50% people are in menopause, and 50% aren't yet. It's often a better metric than the more common average, which is skewed by outliers.
Like, in a country with 10 million people, 10 billionaires make the average income out of synch for the 9,999,9990 normal people. The average income in that country could be 100,000, but the mean income is 70,000. Much more representative of what life actually is for the population.
Got it! Flawless breakdown by the way. If you have anything you want to talk about you're more than welcome to post you thoughts and questions in this community! I may not have all the answers, but I'll definitely do my research and try to help!
She's not too young! Time to find a new doctor. Look for a GYN who specializes in perimenopause. That's what I did and it helped immensely.
Oh gosh! She's ripe for Peri! Yes, that's where she's at. It's very important to have her see another doctor. MEDICAL GASLIGHTING is a thing! Doctors will treat you like you're crazy because they either don't care or they don't know how to treat your symptoms. She need to find another doctor ASAP. Finding the right doctor is kind of like dating. You have to keep trying until you find the right one.
Yeah, we've been through a few now.
Primary health care here (New Zealand) is in an early stage of collapse. Most GP's are not accepting new clients and there's a shortage of GP's generally. Fortunately changing doctors is super easy.
Glad to hear finding a new one won't be too much of a headache, that's most of the battle for most people. What about a specialist for Peri or hormones?