this post was submitted on 28 Oct 2025
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Think my egg cracked and I'm terrified. (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 1 week ago* (last edited 6 days ago) by terreggfied@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/mtf@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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Edit: Just wanted to take a moment to say thank you to all of the kind and informative responses I am getting here, and for all of the constructive discussion I see going on in this thread. You all are amazing. 💜

I’m 34, came from a conservative home that was in a Christian nationalist cult. The idea of homosexuality was an ultimate taboo, I didn’t even learn what “transgender” was until well after puberty, well after I’d casually had the thought to myself that being a woman wouldn’t be so bad. Well after I’d been chastised for playing dress up with my mother’s clothes despite the fact my brother never did.

Even when I did learn of the T in LGBT, I had so many excuses as to why that didn’t apply to me. I’m just overly imaginative. I just get along with some more naturally than men. I just see women as people and feel strongly about their issues because I’m a progressive egalitarian man.

Even when those excuses failed me, I told myself I was genderfluid, or nonbinary. And in many ways those both definitely apply to me still. I do not experience dysphoria existing as a man all the time.

But today I cracked. I messed around in faceapp and touched up a photo of a time id shaven and had my wife put makeup on me and I cracked. I cried. I let myself feel that deep sense of longing I’d always instinctually suppressed.

And then I realized I was well and truly fucked. I live in Oklahoma. I have a child. And I live under some of the worst conditions to be beginning a journey that is being persecuted more than ever….

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[–] terreggfied@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I appreciate all the info and the resources. My wife and I definitely have a lot of thinking to do for ourselves. We’ve made quite the life for ourselves in Oklahoma and it puts us in reasonable proximity to a lot of family and friends.

We will consider many options but my first instinct is to do what I can here. Trans people do and should exist everywhere and in spite of the adversity I know I’ll face I know I can also be an example and a role model right where I am, if I can manage to stand in the face of the tyranny I’ll be subjected to.

One thing I want to do for sure is find a community of other trans and trans-ally individuals here in OK that I can plug into and be a part of.

[–] SCmSTR@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 6 days ago (1 children)

🫂

I fear for you.

[–] terreggfied@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 6 days ago

🫂 Everybody’s struggle is unique but I am strong and have friends and family who would die for me so I will be safe.