I imagine to get a Vogon to play Chess, you would have to get a specially requested form signed in triplicate across 12 different divisions of the Chess Department (A sub-department of the Entertainment and Leisure Department, a department that only one middle manager knows about, and he's on Annual Leave today), one for each type of piece for the game, and again for each colour. After a period of 18 months they will maybe approve your request for the forms you need to fill in to request a game of Chess with one specific Vogon, who will then be asked to fill in another form (also signed in triplicate) to accept the challenge.

By the time you get to actually sitting down to start the chess match, you realise you didn't mention on the form who was going to go first, so you have to pack everything up and start the process all over again!

[–] FordBeeblebrox@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

You’d have a faster and livelier time playing 6 hour session of Monopoly with humans from this backwater planet