this post was submitted on 14 Oct 2025
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Did she get them on a technicality? (infosec.pub)
submitted 3 weeks ago by TehBamski@lemmy.world to c/funny@lemmy.world
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[–] Lembot_0004@discuss.online 39 points 3 weeks ago (5 children)

Judge: That's why it is called "driving under the influence", and it doesn't matter when the drinking happened. Influence is important, not the fact of drinking.

[–] x00z@lemmy.world 16 points 3 weeks ago

"I wasn't influenced by the booze. It was my own choice."

[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 13 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Defendant: Nuh, uh. Everyone knows it’s called “DWI”—driving while intoxicated—which doesn’t really help me either, does it?

[–] peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 8 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

"Your honor, I was not being influenced by the drink I had. It did not say or act in any way such that my behavior would change. Secondly, I was not driving while intoxicated. Intoxicated as defined by the dictionary literally says 'stupefied by alcohol.' that cannot have happened because at no point was I stupid."

[–] SeductiveTortoise@piefed.social 5 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Judges LOVE smartasses.

[–] peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 3 points 3 weeks ago

Eh my assumption is that this woman doesn't realize she's being a smart ass to begin with.

[–] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 1 points 3 weeks ago

Sometimes they do, but I wouldn't try that method. I have been complimented by three different judges for properly parsing and answering their conflicting questions.

[–] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 11 points 3 weeks ago

Curses! Foiled again!

[–] SeductiveTortoise@piefed.social 3 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (2 children)

and it doesn't matter when the drinking happened

"Checkmate, I injected it!!"

[–] HikingVet@lemmy.ca 2 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

*sigh *, it includes intravenous drugs.

[–] SeductiveTortoise@piefed.social 3 points 3 weeks ago

I will not stop until I find some bullshit loophole.

[–] verity_kindle@sh.itjust.works 2 points 3 weeks ago

I accidentally sat down on the bottle and shot it up my butt and GOOD DAY I SAID GOOD DAY.

[–] doingthestuff@lemy.lol 1 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Most places also have open container laws.

[–] FelixCress@lemmy.world 1 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

USA and even Anglosphere is not "most places".

[–] doingthestuff@lemy.lol 1 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Are there a lot of countries that allow open alcohol containers in vehicles?

[–] FelixCress@lemmy.world 1 points 3 weeks ago

Most of legal systems try to stay logical....