this post was submitted on 11 Oct 2025
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It's true. We're awful.
Women are just as bad, but in a different way.
No, turns out, in the exact same way:
https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/08/sinners-stardust-sexual-assault/
https://annalisereads.com/sinners-stardust-2025
https://peggyjaeger.com/2025/08/21/problematic-bookcons/
I am not going to say I agree or disagree with every single 'take' in these articles/posts, nor can I vet every claimed / alleged act for any level of accuracy, but these are pretty comprehensive catalogues of insane levels of sexual harassment committed / alleged to have been committed by either entirely or almost entirely women, at a recent "dark romance" book convention.
I will surely get crucified for pointing this out, but my experience indicates that there is a pervasive mentality among women specifically of certain fandoms that because they are women, they can't be the perpetrators of sexual harassment, only the victims, and then only specifically by men. Therefore they can do whatever they want to other women because we're all girls, so obviously it's "allowed."
This occasionally seems to get logically extended to the notion that women can harass men without consequences, either because only women can be the victims of sexual harassment or violence (see above), or that the men in question ought to just enjoy the attention and be grateful for how "lucky" they are.
All of the above is broadly analogous to one dude coming up to another dude and just grabbing his crotch. Everyone can imagine how that would play out, and thus it's self-evident to any outside observer that this kind of mentality is bullshit.
Oh I've known people like this in real life.
Have literally been sexually harassed by one who then pouted, giggled, and said "come on, you liked it."
Uh, nope, I didn't, but I guess consent is a concept that only applies one way in certain people's minds.
I don't know so much if its certain specific fandoms as it is just... generally being waaaaay too online / brainrotted / having very little real world social experience, and then that often coincides with just being neck deep in some particular fandom or set of fandoms.
Let's be honest, supplying a handful of case examples to the contrary does not refute an argument about society
I didn't see an argument anywhere, uh, what are you referring to?
Are you... dubious at the idea of women broadly having the capacity to be abusive, sexually harass people?
Because I can actually supply stats and make an argument there.
For starters, there is still a massive heteronormative stigma against the idea of men being able to be victims of, or report things like being sexually harassed or worse by women, because when you as a man do that, society broadly ignores or belittles you.
Its... part of how cishet male machismo / performative masculinity functions, it isn't only enforced by men on other men, its enforced by women on men as well.
See how we are still as a society broadly still just laughing at male prison rape, still broadly hesitant to condemn or care about 'older female authority figure takes advantage of younger male subordinate' type siuations as much as we broadly care about the reverse.
https://www.cdc.gov/intimate-partner-violence/about/index.html
The actual paper they cite for those tidbits:
https://stacks.cdc.gov/view/cdc/124646
Yeah, I'm not gonna tell you this is a perfectly gender/sex neutral thing, men obviously have a higher propensity, on average, to do this kind of shit, but uh... 26% of of men being victims is nothing to sneeze at.
Thats roughly 34 million adult men in the US who report being either sexually assaulted/raped/harassed, physically assaulted, and/or stalked by mainly women, given that about 95% of US men identify as hetero, so I guess you can pare that down to about 32 1/3 million male victims of women.
... And, you've probably got some undercounting going on there, both due to the stigma, and due to a woman forcing a man to have sex not even being legally classed as a crime in much of the US.
So yeah, yeah, sexual abuse and harassment and stalking is always wrong, but this is not a thing that only men do, many women do it as well.
As a caveat to this and all the other example figures being thrown around: just because the victim is hetero, does not mean the perpetrator of harassment or assault is too. In a lot of cases it's the victim declining or rejecting the advances outright that only prompts the perp to be more forceful, man or woman.
True, this gets complicated in that way, I don't know off the top of my head a decent study that tries to actually quantify and assess that, as... usually when these wide scale surveys/studies are done, they don't ask for the sexual orientation of the partner, sometimes they don't even ask the victim what their orientation is.
But, there are studies specific to more like, 'sexual violence in the (whichever subsection of LGBTQ+) community'... but at least off the top of my head, I don't know of any that you could...
... basically, do the statistical correction/specification, to get that level of detail.
If you know of any, I'd be glad to read them!
Yes.
You're way off topic here. We're not talking about intimate partner violence, we're talking about making gross statements or inappropriately touching strangers at a Comic Con
Oh, you first critiqued me for a specific anecdote not being relevant at a societal level, and now you don't see how broad data at a societal level, on a very similar kind of activity, is relevant at all?
If you can't follow the logic here, the logic is:
You said an anecdote doesn't prove anything about society.
So I then argued that women broadly certainly have the capacity to commit sexual harassment, as evidenced by their capacity to do very similar things to their partners.
What I am arguing against is the idea that women can be "bad, but in different ways".
No, they can be bad in the exact same ways.
They can commit all kinds of IPV, and, they can disregard the bodily autonomy of others at conventions.
Keep moving that goal post lol
Humans are perverts.
I imagine a timeline were humans weren't horny would be very much different.
It would also have a lot fewer humans in it I guess
That's not necessarily a bad thing.
If only.
"Horny" is more fitting IMO. Animals do a lot of fucked up sexual things, too, the main difference is that most of them aren't horny year-round.
I dont know many animals that will willing suck another animals toes while another animal pours hot wax on the first animal while another animal sitting in the dark corner watches and pours hot wax on itself while patting another animal wrapped up in the tanned leather of another animal, as 2 other animals film it.
Incorrect. The natural world DGAF about your ethics or feelings or genders or needs or starry-eyed Disney-glittered wishes.
~~Read a fucking book.~~ Sorry, I'd meant to aim that at the fuckery going on further up the thread, not in reply to the comment directly above. 🙏🏼
Did I get that right, you're saying that animals are horny year-round? Or are you saying that it's my starry-eyed Disney-glittered wishes that make me say that animals do a lot of fucked up sexual things?
I think he means ducks and otters raping each other to death is more a result of neurochemistry and behavior than a specific intention to fulfill sexual satisfaction.
Like a guy leaving tooth marks on a woman, pervert. Another animal biting to get a better hold, not so much.
Yes, this, thank you. I was way overdue for sleep at the time, sorry. 🙇🏼♂️🥹
Shit. Sorry! I meant to phrase the latter bit as aimed at the various morons gathered above, not you specifically. I really shouldn't scroll when I'm so damn tired I can't type cogently. 🫠
Essentially? Animals aren't "horny". That's a human construct. Nature DGAF about our hairless monkey noises and clever tools that we use to name things. Creatures do alllll sorts of "fucked up" things all the time, and have been for far longer than bones've existed. 🤓😅
That said, this thread is radioactive AF, and I'm sorry for any confusion I contributed to. I do my best to be an advocate for the Platinum Rule, and the async mode of comms inherent to forums like ours isn't exactly helping foster understanding & community at the moment. 🤦🏼♂️🫡
True, at least men don’t walk around essentially naked but yell "pervert omg I’ve been abused" as soon as someone expresses that they find them sexy.
Ah yes, the entirely original "did you see how she was dressed?" defense.
I wouldn’t exactly call the woman in the picture "dressed"
So if i go to the nudist beach i can grope and molest the people present? Or is it at least less bad?
Moving the goalposts
Yeah thats not moving the goal post. Try blaming how bad the comparison is but make sure not to answer my question 👍
The discussion is about a half-naked woman at a comic convention and you ask about a nudist beach, if that’s not moving the goalpost then what is lol
So she must be "asking for it", right?
You're disgusting.
Of course she is, didn't you see the large hat?!
I hope you don’t spend much time at beaches.
Have you not seen a middle aged male German tourist?
I'm all outta eyebleach... so it's happened at least once.
Who hurt you
Don't fake empathy, it diminishes yourself and is clearly seen through
Whoosh
I don't think this really qualifies, I'm aware it's rhetorical
Well, nobody who stared at my boobs ever did.