this post was submitted on 09 Oct 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


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Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

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[โ€“] Atkat@leminal.space 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Hahaha amazing!!!

I feel now like my language choices before...perhaps they made it sound like I wanted my cat to bring me just the dicks, no man attached to them, haha, but no. It was just a synecdoche, having the man be represented by a dick, lol. Like how people call their car their "wheels" though wheels aren't the whole car. Or more directly how men might say they're going out to try and get some p***y, when they mean an entire woman.

And of course men have other parts to themselves thatcI appreciate. Take legs for example- pants require legs so they can be worn, and pants are where the wallet pocket hangs! Legs are also essential for getting them to leave my place when we're done. ๐Ÿ˜Ž (So joking, I promise. I'm not really like this at all. ๐Ÿ˜‚).

All this time in life wasted though, only ever engaging with the permanently-attached-to-a-peron ones of these (silicone not withstanding). I just didn't know there was another option!

Could you imagine something like this scene playing out though: say a guy shells out for a cool new surgery to make his penis detachable. Its a success! He goes to see his girl later, when it's all healed up. Soon after the girl's upset and starts yelling at this guy she's dating, because he was getting a bit too handsy and she was really trying to have a serious conversation with him.

She's like, "COULD YOU PLEASE, like just this once, STOP THINKING WITH YOUR GODDAMN F-ING DICK so we can actually TALK about what's going on with us?".

Then to her surprise he's just like, "sure", then he reaches down into his shorts, detaches his detachable penis, and pulls it out for her to see it for first time detached. You know, the pull out method.๐Ÿ˜‚

Would she be stoked or horrified I wonder?

[โ€“] tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 day ago

Ah, a fellow lover of metonymy. I hope your cat brings you all the dicks attached to people that you could ever hope for.