The Onion and other satire w/ layers

Donald Trump has condemned France’s decision to jail former President Nicolas Sarkozy, describing it as “radical Marxism of the worst kind, almost as bad as letting poor people have healthcare.”

The US President, himself freshly branded a convicted felon, insisted that imprisoning leaders for financial crimes was “totally un-American” and a “sad, rigged, disgusting witch hunt, probably run by Hillary, Obama, and a wind turbine.”

“This is the sort of woke socialist madness you’d expect from France,” Trump told reporters at a press conference where they had to sign a waiver confirming they would not ask questions about his 34 criminal convictions.

“Jailing a president for financial crime is terrible, folks. Just terrible. Unless it’s Biden, in which case, orange jumpsuit, solitary confinement, and no ice cream for life.” [...]

Archived: https://web.archive.org/web/20250926111439/https://newsthump.com/2025/09/26/locking-up-corrupt-presidents-for-financial-crimes-sets-a-terrible-precedent-warns-president-with-34-felony-convictions-for-financial-crime/

Context: Reuters: Former French President Sarkozy handed 5-year jail term in stunning downfall