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You win.

This is the entire reason why I put smart lights and smart light switches in my entire house except in the kitchen and bathroom.

It's all about safety. It will be the same reason why I never want to let any range/stove/oven to ever be able to be controlled remotely. It's not just that I don't want to enable it, I don't want it to be possible.

At most, for a "smart" oven, I want to know when it's on and what temp it is, mostly so that I can create automations to text me when it's been on for too long to let me know I'm stupid and left the oven on.... With the fridge, same deal if I forgot to close the fridge, or if the fridge stops keeping things cold.

That's the most I would want. Reporting only. But if the "smart" device can control anything about its operation remotely, fuck that.

With a washer/dryer, I would only want end-of-cycle alerts because I'm frequently too far away from it where I normally hang out at home, to hear the bell. Reporting. That's it.

I can accomplish most of that with an esp32 and a variety of off the shelf sensors, or by tying into existing circuits on the machine to get their status, then send alerts through home assistant. No vendor specific BS required.