this post was submitted on 15 Sep 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] kelpie_returns@lemmy.world 49 points 2 days ago (17 children)

People of the penile persuasion can sit while peeing. It is very easy to do.

[–] IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world 11 points 2 days ago (12 children)
[–] trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 36 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

Why do you have morning wood at a public toilet

[–] IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world 34 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I cannot believe my morning erections are being judged by trash girlfriend.

[–] trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I am literally trash girlfriend and Ive never had morning wood at a public toilet

I feel like if I judge you its gotta be a good reason at that point

[–] IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

One day you will go to a public toilet to realize you have morning wood, then you will understand the struggle.

[–] trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Waking up in a public toilet does sound fun but since Ive taken estrogen I dont ger morning wood often

[–] IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago (2 children)

so you saying the real solution for peeing with morning wood is estrogen?

i would transition but there's no ikea near me for the mandatory Blahaj.

[–] trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

You can order both the blahaj and the estrogen online

[–] IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I guess I'm trans now, hopefully there are no social/political consequences for being trans in this precise moment in history in the United States.

[–] trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I'm now on the side that everyone needs to sit down to pee. but as a compromise, everyone is allowed to go number 2 standing up

[–] SuDmit@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Did you mean... You wood transition?

I guess wood is inescapable

[–] benderbeerman@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

If we could simply choose when we got erections, high school would have been much less awkward

[–] Ziglin@lemmy.world 1 points 21 hours ago

You or your classmates must have been quite bad at hiding them. I never noticed anyone having an erection in school and I never felt sexually attracted to anyone there either.

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 2 days ago (2 children)

how the fuck do you piss with wood anyways? just wait 5 minutes

[–] LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Proceeds to pee like the guy in Upload

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

i was really impressed by the window trick

I like that some developer in that series went out of their way to ensure they could do not wrong when peeing. Out the window.. 100% no splash

[–] empireOfLove2@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

brother if you got wood how tf are you peeing sitting down. That shit pointing up

[–] rumschlumpel@feddit.org 10 points 1 day ago (3 children)

If it's pointing up, how the fuck you hit the bowl standing up?

[–] benderbeerman@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago (1 children)

You step back real far and lean forward, stabilize with your hand on the tank. It might take a lil practice but it's light years better than trying to bend it down

[–] Sadbutdru@sopuli.xyz 4 points 1 day ago

You can lean forward even better starting from a sitting position, chest down, hips up with slight rotation.

Leaning and hoping your hand doesn't go through the drywall. Luckily for me by the time I gained weight I didn't have the morning issues all the time.

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[–] spikespaz@programming.dev 6 points 1 day ago (2 children)

It comes with the risk of contamination or infection if you're well endowed.

[–] BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I'm not well endowed, at best I'm average... at best. But while I don't touch the water, I hit the front of the bowl. It's disgusting to feel the cold porcelain.

[–] juliebean@lemmy.zip 4 points 1 day ago (2 children)

do such people also have to poop while standing?

[–] Sadbutdru@sopuli.xyz 3 points 1 day ago

No they just sling it round their neck for that.

[–] spikespaz@programming.dev 2 points 1 day ago

Analyze the form factor of toilet. Is it one of those round ones that's sized for potty-training a child? Emergencies only. The bowl deep enough and water low enough? Push dick down with one hand, hope Poseidon doesn't kiss your willy. Stand up far to wipe, don't sit down too fast. Try not to piss under the seat.

Prefer to avoid public restrooms for shits, stand up to pee.

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