Men’s Mental Health

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I’m admittedly new to running a community anywhere online, but saw a need so I’m trying to fill it and help where I can. I’ve had plenty of my own issues over the years and am hoping for a safe space where men can discuss their own brands of issues. For now we’re gonna run by the Bartender Rule & few other rules stolen shamelessly from !mentalhealth@lemmy.world :

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I don't feel like I'm going to get back. (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 8 hours ago* (last edited 3 hours ago) by JokeDeity@sh.itjust.works to c/mensmentalhealth@lemmy.world

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It's been 4 or 5 months since I lost the love of my life that I spent over a decade with and I feel like it happened yesterday. I cannot, for any reason, go more than 5 minutes without thinking about her. I don't see the light. I don't see anything in this world that brings me joy or expect to ever again. Sometimes it feels like every day that passes I get worse instead of better. I'm laying in my new house and I should be happy to have so many people that support me and the fact that I even have a house to begin with, but instead I'm just looking at my pistols. I feel like I want out, and I don't know what's kept me from doing it so far, because all I do is cry and want to sleep and feel like shit. I work, I go home, I stare at YouTube videos my brain isn't even actually processing because I'm just thinking about her. Even at the gym my brain just won't get off of it. Even at work it doesn't stop. I'm just so tired and I don't remember the last time I genuinely smiled from being happy about anything, every new day feels like Mt Everest without a Sherpa. I've had other very difficult breakups, but they don't even show up on the chart next to the pain I'm feeling every day from this one.

I'm just so fucking tired.

Edit: I'm at work and can't respond to everyone right now, but I still wanted to read the comments. I really appreciate you Internet strangers, even if I don't really feel better right now, it's fucking cool that you people are trying to help someone you'll likely never meet. ❤️

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[–] NocturnalMorning@lemmy.world 2 points 2 hours ago

Are there any support groups in your area? I go to a free support group for survivors once a week. I am sure you can find something. There are low cost therapists, and sometimes insurance can cover it. I totally get having a bad experience with a therapist. Ive had a few bad experiences myself, but I've also found therapists that were an excellent fit for me.

But, if therapy isnt an option, talk to someone, anyone. You cannot work through this by yourself. It took me years to get over my ex-wife. And i was in the same head space you are in now, but I didnt have access to guns. If I were you, I would get rid of any guns you own, for your own safety.

And please, for the love of God, be kind to yourself. You are not a failure, and you will get through this! I believe with everything in my heart that you will make it through this and come out with a better understanding of yourself.

Relationships dont have to ruin who you are. Do not let this woman steal who you are! You had a life before her, and you can have a life after her, just as fulfilling. I promise you, from someone who has been in your shoes, it will slowly with time get better, even if it doesn't feel like it now.

Please dont beat yourself up about what happened. It takes two people to end a relationship. If you need to DM someone and talk this out,, my DMs are open my dude!