this post was submitted on 30 Jul 2025
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on the male loneliness epidemic (infosec.pub)
submitted 3 days ago by carotte@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/curatedtumblr@sh.itjust.works
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Show transcriptScreenshot of a Tumblr post by nongunktional:

when i first heard about the male loneliness epidemic i was like oh yeah close camaraderie and bonding between men is often discouraged in favor of competition or, if not discouraged, at least filtered through a lens of individualism that precludes deep connections. and then i learned what people meant by it (men arent getting laid) to which i say skill issue

to all the men out there not getting laid: try less hard to get laid and try more hard to be an enjoyable and relaxing presence

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[–] starman2112@sh.itjust.works 31 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (8 children)

I love posts that explicitly state that my loneliness is entirely my fault, and not an unprecedented societal issue affecting more people than ever before

try less hard to get laid and try more hard to be an enjoyable and relaxing presence

Been doing that for 30 years. Is there another step?

[–] Soup@lemmy.world -4 points 2 days ago (4 children)

Where do you live? Do you do stuff with other people? How do you talk to them if you do?

I live in a city full of people and public transit; shit practically just happens to me. I showed up to a birthday party last year and autistic yapped my way into an entire new friend group in a matter of hours. Where I grew up, though, that wasn’t gunna happen because all I had was being isolated and it took driving into the city for dancing every week to build a decent group of friends on top of my two-three reliable best friends.

[–] AnyOldName3@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

You're already doing better than a whole lot of people if you're getting invited to parties. Of the people I was at school, university, or work with, I'm the only one who bothers hosting parties, and that won't broaden my social circle as I already know everyone. Most people don't have enough living space to have more than a few people over and can't afford to cater for a bunch of extra people. Even for attending parties someone else hosts, travel and accommodation can be a pain. If you're not within taxi range and there isn't abundant late night public transport, you'll either need to not drink and then drive home, find a hotel, or hope the party is small enough that there'll be space to crash.

[–] Soup@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

We do things at the park. Picnic potluck things where bringing food isn’t really the biggest point so it’s more like snacks and things, and people know to eat before and after

And look, if you live out in the middle of nowhere I get it, but that’s not a “male loneliness epidemic” that’s just the reality of that type of living; it’s very isolating and if it is specific to men then it’s time to ask what the women are doing differently and give it a go.

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