hey everyone. i'll cut to the chase:
be careful of users like https://lemmy.world/u/Sadbunny3. we met 18 days ago and privately messaged each other a few days before exchanging contact information. i thought her speaking style was "odd" but not off. conversations flowed logically, past texts were referenced and thread replied to.. everything seemed rather genuine. this person appealed to me as somebody wanting a friend. we shared interests and then our personal lives. over the next few days i was told that this person wanted to help me out of my financial predicament that i confessed i was in.
i pushed back. i brought up how i felt uncomfortable, how i was disbelieving in their kindness, and they reassured me every step of the way that there are good people out there and sometimes good things do happen. they agreed with me that there are tons of bad actors out there, but they wanted to convey their seriousness to me, and that they weren't pulling my leg.
it took me another day or so to be willing to have them walk the walk. they asked how much my expenses were and started adding up totals. again, i called attention to the fact this was very, very strange. i didn't understand why somebody who knew so little of me valued me so much. in a way, i wanted to believe this was possible. i wanted to believe that maybe, just maybe, a new friend was that generous.
lol
lmao
guys
no
as they were setting things up today they told me they were going to ask their accountant to wire me money (this was supposedly a therapist which explained their gaps in responses). i said ok thinking still that this was not going to happen. then, they informed me they had to send a check and blah blahFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK...noooo i'm so dumb godddddd!!!!! i said nahhh, not comfortable giving out my address. then they hit me with a "ohhh it'll be an email that is quick, easy, and convenient!" y'know, the way people talk to each other?
18 days. they pursued me for two weeks. i called them out and dialed their number until they answered. silence on the other end; not a single sound other than breathing. i blocked them and came to Lemmy to see if they were trying to message me or others. nope! and guess what? they stopped making public posts 18 days ago. they got me. they didn't need the account anymore.
i was floored. i have avoided many, many scams online. i ultimately prevented my first but it got uncomfortably far. i trusted someone i shouldn't have when there were red flags early. however, i didn't know those were red flags now in 2025. somebody not having the most fluid way of texting can be explained, but now i have to consider that a tell if things don't add up. idk just make sure you are being more skeptical nowadays, please. don't get scammed like i almost did.
Honestly, the most horrible thing about this is that people like you are even more cautious
Because that's just true. I often get emotionally attached quickly to people, and there are situations in which I've done similar stuff to help people.
I don't really get the scam though; in what way would they have scammed you by giving your email address?
I don't feel like the takeaway should be being more sceptical though. I mean, in the end there always is a point at which a scammer would… well, ask you to do something that would enable them to scam you. And if you truly let your whole worldview be determined by them, you just let them win.
it's a bait and switch. they were going to wire me money. then they suddenly had to cut a check instead for me to cash. when i said no to giving out my address they said oh it'll be emailed! this is scam behavior. i don't know exactly what their intent was nor is it relevant. i don't know how they planned on getting money out of me but that's what they were doing.
There is a scam whereby a check is sent for too much, and you're told to remit the difference. Then the check bounces. It might have been some version of that.
Why is saying oh it'll be emailed scam behaviour?
are you actually asking how what i am describing is scam behavior? i'm only acting this way because i'm sorry, but it is extremely obvious based on the past 30 years of the internet what was going on. i feel as though i shouldn't have to explain to you that somebody saying they're going to wire me money, no they'll send me a check, no they'll send me an email is scam behavior.
They might be like 12
Do 12 year olds even know what a check is these days?
And you sound like a prime mark, or an idiot, or intentionally contrarian - or all of the above. Good luck.
I feel like scams are getting more and more dedicated. If you have the patience to pursue someone for 18 days, you have the patience to use any and all information you get to try and further your agenda.
If you get ahold of an email, there are two main things I'm thinking: One is opening up the potential for spear-phishing. You can hold on to that email for a little while, so the email you're about to send is seemingly not connected to you, and the contents of this email could be using any information acquired through the conversations. Say the victim talked about the reason for their economic troubles being taxes, and in another convo they mention that the weather here in California is so great. Bingo! You can now forge a targetted email for taxes from the IRS as a resident of the state of California.
The second thing is that you can look up other accounts where the same email is used, giving you a second angle or perhaps even a second chance by messaging from a different account, on a different platform, at a different time. This may be desirable if the target has shown potential of more large payouts (even if it means indebting the victim).
Could be check fraud. I got targeted by a work scam that ended up being counterfeit (stolen)