this post was submitted on 30 Jul 2025
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Don't be mean. I promise to do my best to judge that fairly.
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I mean, the answer is that it is both. Like, not having close friends sucks. And not getting laid sucks. And both are valid and legitimate things to complain about.
Like, honestly, the "skill issue" take is super toxic. It's basically the same as telling a poor person that not being rich is a skill issue. The lack of understanding and compassion for peoples' legitimate problems will only radicalize them further.
the men who won't man up need to be told to man up, especially if they tried to man up by imitating a child predator fascist.
And by dismissing their very real issues as a trivial matter not worthy of even discussing, you've now pushed them into the arms of people who make false promises and exploit them.
Congrats, you shot yourself in the foot.
I'm not saying that punishing politically toxic men is trivial, I'm saying it's worth doing. You can't make a man change by pandering to him, you have to actually communicate with them directly, or they'll tune you out.
What you're doing is not communicating with them. You're preemptively dismissing them as your enemy and then acting surprised when they walk towards those who are acting welcoming.
"Not immediately insulting them over their voiced concerns" isn't pandering...