this post was submitted on 25 Jul 2025
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me_irl
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The first and last time I was on a trampoline, I tried to do a backflip and landed on my chest in a full scorpion. My spine whipped and cracked pretty much every join in my spine. It was loud enough for the people standing next to the trampoline to hear.
I felt such unknown levels of comfort and relaxation that I was worried that I had just paralyzed myself, until I realized I could feel my toes.
That was the only time in my life I have experienced such nirvana, from the tension and pressure being released from my back to the euphoria of not being paralyzed. It was a serene tranquility that I imagine only the Buddha knows. I was in a moment of Zen that can otherwise only be achieved through dying of natural causes while meditating.
30 years later, after getting an X-ray for some unrelated thing, the doctor: "Wow did you know four of your vertebrae were fractured?"
It is a relief knowing I have like 6 years before I get the bad news.
I had zero pain or discomfort after(totally the opposite) and was very conscious of any signs that I might need to go to the hospital. All was well, but I am sure I came very close to having a bad time.
You might be on to a new revolutionary form of modern back pain treatment
Simpsons did it.
You could always try heroin
/s
I had some friends do that. I'd ask them for advice on doing heroin, but I ain't got a ouija board.
Come to think of it, I think one of the people who heard my vertibre crack OD'd a few years later.