this post was submitted on 17 Jul 2025
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[–] toofpic@lemmy.world 122 points 2 weeks ago (56 children)

I had a goth friend who would always get laid without much trouble. At some point he got a normal job and had to "become a normie", and I learned that it wasn't because he was a goth, it was because he was a complete asshole with women, and some women, for some reason, can't resist assholes.

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 21 points 2 weeks ago (23 children)

When you say things like "some women can't resist assholes" it sounds like red pill rhetoric. A better way to say it might be like "some assholes prey on women's insecurities". Keep the focus on the person who is the problem, not the victims.

[–] Jax@sh.itjust.works 41 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (8 children)

When you say things like "some assholes prey on women's insecurities" it's incredibly condescending, especially when you consider that women can also be assholes.

Like begets like. I've known too many couples where both of the people in the relationship are trash.

[–] Damage@feddit.it 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Anyone can be a victim, condescension has nothing to do with that.

[–] Jax@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

And anyone can be an asshole, assuming that all women are simply victims is 100% condescending towards women.

[–] Damage@feddit.it -1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

assuming that all women are simply victims

That wasn't stated

[–] Jax@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Correcting 'some women can't resist assholes' with 'some assholes prey on women's insecurities' doesn't strike you as assuming that these women are all victims?

Ok, sure — I'm not going to debate this any further.

[–] Damage@feddit.it -1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Nowhere it was stated that ALL women are victims.

Saying that some people might be susceptible to certain kind of exploitation doesn't imply that all people of that group alhave that issue, or that they're somehow inferior

[–] Jax@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 weeks ago

Yeah, sure — whatever.

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