Sorry for the catchy title! Let me explain.
I, 21F, was in an almost 6 month relationship with a girl, also my age. The first 3 months everything was smooth sailing, we live together in the same dorm building and things where chill. However, we had to go long distance due to summer vacation. Then, things started to get weird: she wouldn't reply to my messages for 6-8 hours (mind you, to conversation starters such as "good morning, how u doing, have you got any plans for the day" etc.) and wouldn't want to play games or watch movies with our friends online like before. After a month of this I raised this issue to her through FaceTime. She seemed to acknowledge it and told me she'll try to get better. That, I think, made things much worse. Conversations seemed so forced, and when we talked through the phone she answered with a dry, cut-to-the-chase tone, never asking me further than the bare minimum of "how are u". I somehow put up with this for a month, thinking that maybe exams had been rough and she was tired. Then, after I asked her randomly one day to play a game of Risk online (which, she refused), she blew up and started telling me that I always thought the worst of her, that I made her feel insecure about her degree and that I got exactly what I wanted from her (apparently, a talking schedule rather than a conversation). This caught me as a surprise. She'd never told me anything was going wrong and suddenly she had a loooong list of things I did that hurt her. I apologized, not knowing about what exactly, but none the less I valued her and our relationship more than being "right" on a small and out of the blue argument. Apparently this posture of trying to understand what happened and why she felt that way was actually "cold and manipulative" (exact phrasing, btw). I apologized, again, because I really wanted to make things right. She told me she needed to fix things in person, so she'd be no-contact until we meet again in her hometown for a trip we had planned with our group of friends. I agreed and so the next time we spoke was when I got off the train and into her car for the hour long ride to her hometown.
Long story short (because this could be another post) the trip was an utter failure, she wouldn't even look at me and wouldn't answer until I'd asked multiple times (she did not do this to my other friend, who was super confused and kinda astonished), among many other awful things (in which she started to also misstreat this other friend). Fast forward to me being back home processing whatever happened, I called her, asked why she treated us, and specially me, that way. I honestly wanted to understand how did she wanted to fix things when she would barely speak to me. She said she had already forgot, and that things were actually sorted out. I couldn't take anymore, so I cut things off because I saw she didn't want to fix things, but rather keep being mad. She told me she would call me before the new academic year to see how we we're feeling and how we wanted to manage the new situation. Rest to say, that call hasn't happened yet, and she avoids me like the plague (like, shamelessly getting up from the table if she sees me coming over to have lunch with our friends).
So, here is the AITA. She moved rooms to be right next to one of our friends (not the one from the trip tho). Whenever I stop by this friend's room she goes feral pounding on the wall, hitting doors, walking up and down the corridor like a beast in a cage. I tried confronting her about this and she angrily (over text, because she doesn't even dare look my way) said that I am no being considerate with her and that I am invading her space (with my voice) by being in the next room over, and that I'm basically stalking her and should stop hanging around there. I stood my ground and told her she didn't get to decide what happened on the room next door, but rather my friend since its her room. The thing is, not only does my friend live next door, but we also share the same group of friends (or used to, since this devacle has left me for dead, for the rest of the group has sided with her even tho no one asked how I'm dealing with the breakup), and we study at the same faculty. Am I really "messing" or "stalking" her? I don't want to she her just as much as she doesn't want to see me, but it's almost impossible not to at least run into each other in a corridor.
NTAH. you’re simply living in shared spaces and spending time with mutual friends. that’s not stalking from my POV. it’s just life in a shared environment. if she’s uncomfortable with you being in the next room, that’s her problem.