Transgender

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Even the most inoffensive posts turn into arguments over pronouns (lemmy.world)

submitted 6 months ago by dragonfucker@lemmy.world to c/transgender@lemmy.blahaj.zone

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This morning drag made a post to the Dull Men's Club on lemmy.world. Drag isn't a man, but that doesn't seem to actually be a requirement. Drag talked about making sushi that wasn't too sour for drag's partner with avocado. Drag doesn't see how that could possibly be offensive to anyone.

A few people replied on topic, but most of the thread is an argument about drag's pronouns. Drag refused to engage, because... it's the Dull Men's Club! The rules say no politics because politics is too interesting. Drag was asked if drag was trolling. How are the pronouns drag uses for dragself on a boring post about sushi acidity supposed to offend anyone?

The mod did step in and remove two of the comments discussing pronouns. But most of the thread is still a debate about drag's pronouns and Blahaj's rules about misgendering for some reason. And drag was told not to report so many comments for not being dull.

Why can't drag have one boring, normal conversation without people asking about drag's pronouns, attacking Ada, calling drag a troll, hell, even trying to diagnose drag with OCD!

Drag does do a lot of dramaposting, but if this is the result of an inoffensive post about rice vinegar, what's the point trying to avoid drama at all? It doesn't work. It feels awful to be avoiding conflict and doing nothing while being treated like a punching bag just for existing.

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[–] dragonfucker@lemmy.world 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Drag knows plenty of people who are good. Some of them are on Blahaj.

[–] actionjbone@sh.itjust.works 1 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Yeah, as always, there are both good people and bad people. And others in between.

But the trauma caused by the bad ones often outweighs the positiveness caused by the good ones, at least in our minds.

I'll add that, often, if someone doesn't understand another person, they might think there is something wrong with the other person. I didn't at first realize the way you were referring to yourself in the first person, but that doesn't mean there was anything wrong with it. I accepted that I was confused, and then I thought about why I was confused. By thinking about why, I was able to understand.

People who jump to "there's something wrong" often don't take the time to understand.