this post was submitted on 22 Aug 2024
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Funny: Home of the Haha

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[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 86 points 1 year ago (3 children)

My wife is nearly annoy proof. If I texted that, she would get all warm and fuzzy.

[–] jballs@sh.itjust.works 76 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Sounds like your wife is keeping the Live, Laugh, Love pillow manufacturers in business.

[–] don@lemm.ee 18 points 1 year ago (1 children)

“Why fit in when you’re born to stand out?”

[–] blanketswithsmallpox@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] nomous@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It doesn't matter what comes, fresh goes better in life!

[–] Chekhovs_Gun@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I feel like chicken tonight, like chicken tonight!

[–] jawa21@lemmy.sdf.org 5 points 1 year ago

Hot dogs. Armor hot dogs!

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 33 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Have you tried removing the toilet seat 1 hour after your wife goes to bed, so that when she gets up to pee at 2am and doesn't turn on the light, she falls in?

Then you burst in, snap a pic, and upload it to your instagram with the caption "I keep the bitches pussy wet!"

Maybe THAT will annoy her?

[–] lazylion_ca@lemmy.ca 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Well we cant have that, of course. You need to try some new tactics.