this post was submitted on 30 Jun 2024
22 points (100.0% liked)
Melbourne
2198 readers
35 users here now
This community is a place created for the people of Melbourne and Victoria. We are a positive, welcoming and inclusive community. We might not agree about everything, but we always strive to stay civil and respectful.
The focus of our discussions is based around things that affect Victoria, but we are also free to discuss our local perspective on wider issues. Or head to the regular Daily Random Discussion thread to talk about anything.
Ongoing discussions, FAQs & Resources (still under construction)
Adoption Certificate for Nellie, the Daily Thread numbat (with thanks to @Catfish)
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
This is an old throwback now: Does anyone remember me complaining about some "Mates" Who had kids and made some really distasteful "Jokes" back when we were still struggling ourselves? Something about throwing their baby in the bin or something cause he was frustrating them? Well, got a bit of an update on them.
Drama
They are struggling. Hard. Her mental health is in the bin, and he is pushed for time having taken a job that seems him out of the house from 5am till 6 or 7 pm. Add another kid to the mix and its not going well. he made a joke about "Needing more support". I laughed cause we also don't have family around us. But I think it was kind of a hint and I just.... fucking no chance. I didn't say anything, but there is NO way we're stepping into that mess.Almost everything that's going wrong was visible from a mile away before they made the decision. Her mental health is crap cause her family fucking suck, but she does running back to them every time. They threw a dog and another baby on top of the first one who I think has some development issues. The whole thing is a mess and i know it sounds cruel, but there's no way to help them without them trying to suck you into the vortex of their drama. I've made that mistake 2 or 3 times before, I'm not making it a 4th time. If you could just drop off a meal or babysit for a bit to help without hearing how horrible everything is and leaving feeling worse for having done a nice thing.. I feel sorry for them, but at what point do you go "You've kind of shot yourself in the foot there, can you please not bleed on my kitchen floor?"
Good grief. And here I am, early thirties, stressed I'm falling behind.
Don't burn yourself to keep others warm. They both need help, but they need to ask the right orgs. The most I would do is point them towards Ask Izzy if they're struggling financially.
Honestly reckon they just need an adult to come in and go "Right, you do X, You do Y! No not tomorrow, right fucking now!" But good point on burning yourself to keep others warm. We're managing ok where we are right now, but if we're being honest having a toddler is tough some days! Rewarding, dont get me wrong! But tough. We're all running our own race.