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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/ThrowRA89767 on 2026-03-08 06:05:26+00:00.

A few days ago I was at a pet store to admire cats since I’m allergic and can’t have one. Unfortunately they didn’t have cats but I saw these cute birds with pikachu red dot cheeks where one was on top of the other, I saw it as the one on top surfing or like having a piggy back ride. I thought it was so cute and got a 15 second video of it and then posted it on my snap story with Surfin Bird from Family Guy in the background and forgot about it. I went to work the next day and showed my coworker, she immediately explained it was birds mating. Everyone I have on snap probably thinks I’m a bird pervert now and I’m hoping my coworker doesn’t go to HR for me accidentally showing her bird sex at work. She was laughing so here’s hoping. Anyways if you see animals being cute make sure they aren’t procreating before you post them to social media or show coworkers.

TL;DR : Posted a video of birds doing it to my snap story and showed it to a coworker before realizing that they were doing it.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/slender_dwarf on 2026-03-08 02:00:49+00:00.

I’ve been feeling so out of place. I’m 25 years old I recently lost my brother he passed away at 30. My other brother passed away at 24. I have no friends. I’m in school for nursing. But I’ve been drowning myself in liquor everyday. I just feel nothing anymore I’m failing my classes. I have to work full time now since my brother passed I pay all the bills. Normally I talk and pray to God. But now I’ve been distant. I’m not praying anymore I know this is bad to say but I feel like God is upset with me. I just don’t know anything anymore. I’m scared but at the same time I just don’t care about anything not even myself.

I don’t know if I’ll ever shake back. All I do now is drink I make myself look stupid just getting pissy drunk. I’ve gained so much weight I’m not loving myself. I don’t know how to speak with God anymore I feel worthless.

TL;DR: I don’t know where I went wrong I just don’t know

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/RegularBitter3482 on 2026-03-07 23:47:47+00:00.

Obligatory it wasn’t today it was last summer.

I drove a couple hundred miles to an awesome fishing spot in Seward Alaska for the weekend to catch some Sockeye Salmon.

My car radiator exploded 75 miles or so out of town around midnight on a stretch of road with zero cell phone service.

I put on my hazards and hoped for the best. I was really lucky a state worker drove by and followed me all the way into town while I kept stopping to fill the radiator with water (the cap was bad so wouldn’t seal).

Of course I drove right to the fishing hole and went right to work fishing. Got my limit for the day and limped my car into town and made it to the repair shop. They got to work fixing the problem but it was going to be a few days for parts and labor so I was stuck in Seward for a while.

I had my dog, all my fishing gear and my beach wagon I use when fishing on the beach to get all my gear around.

So I loaded up the wagon, and hoofed it into town, leaving my car at the shop.

I had a large mason jar of food and water for the pup and just a hodge podge of gear in my wagon.

I want planning on staying at all it was supposed to be a drive up then drive back the next day kind of deal so I didn’t have much in the way of a change of clothes etc.

So the next few days consisted of me wondering around town with my dog and wagon in tow, fishing, hanging out on the beach, and just going with the flow.

I had a little routine and would walk up, grab coffee and a bite and go sit up on the bench by the boardwalk. I started to see the same tourists over and over again, and I guess most of them decided I was a local house less person with my little dog fishing to get a meal on the table because I was just pretty much wondering around town ALL day, and cooking meals on the beach grills.

So I was sitting with my coffee and dog with her bowl of water out and a family came up and had a meal for me from the restaurant across the street, they were super nice but just said we’ve seen you around and thought you could use a hot meal…..well who am I to refuse a free meal?? I thanked them and they walked away looking really content, I figured it was a one off but I was mistaken.

Next day, same situation, different family, different restaurant, and this time they had also brought a box of dog treats for my pup, saying they had seen the family yesterday and thought they would pitch in…..At this point I couldn’t (well I could have) explained my situation but I didn’t want to make them feel bad so again I took the meal and thanked them.

Apparently word spreads fast as the coffee shop folks when I went by the next AM told me my coffee and snack was on the house at this point I decided this was my life and went with the flow.

Four days later my car was fixed, I enjoyed my free meals, coffee and snacks and got a whole new appreciation for the kindness that some humans hold.

TL;DR- my car broke down while I was out of town and because people saw me wondering around all day with a wagon full of belongings, a cooler full of fish and my dog in tow they thought I was a local houseless person (which I KIND of was) and had more than one family stop and give me meals out of the kindness of their hearts.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Just-an-account2 on 2026-03-07 16:27:38+00:00.

So my ( 20F) roommate ( 21F ) bought us matching keychains a few months ago. For some context, we had talked before about keychains, and I mentioned that I was thinking of getting one for myself. I completely forgot about that conversation until about a week later, when she excitedly showed me the ones she bought for us.

She pulled two big fluffy balls from behind her back. Hers was pink and mine was black. They were these large furry balls with golden kitten whiskers glued in the middle and a pair of glittery cat ears on top. Don’t get me wrong, I really appreciated that she thought of me, but the keychain is completely not my style. I didn’t want her to feel bad, so I just said I loved it. She even told me she was happy because one of her friends said they were ugly, but she liked them and thought I would too.

It’s also worth mentioning that I usually carry my keys in my jeans pocket, which quickly became impossible because of the size of the keychain. At first I started keeping them in my bag, but I got frustrated with having to dig around while standing in front of the building entrance. So I decided to remove the keychain, put it in my wardrobe, and just carry the keys in my pocket again.

Normally, I’d leave them next to the door, but I started taking them with me into my room so my roommate wouldn’t notice that I had stopped using the keychain. However, about a week ago I accidentally left them by the door. When my roommate noticed the keychain was gone, she looked a bit bothered and asked why I wasn’t using it and whether I didn’t like it anymore. It caught me so off guard that I just blurted out that I lost it.

At the time I thought maybe it would all work out, I wouldn’t have to keep hiding that I don’t use it, and I wouldn’t have to hurt my roommate’s feelings either.

However, yesterday when I came back to the apartment, my roommate came up to me with a huge smile and said she had something for me.

She had bought me another keychain.

The exact same one I had “lost.”

And that’s how my lie turned into me being stuck with a giant fluffy kat keychain for the next two years.

TL;DR: Lied about losing a keychain I didn’t like, roommate replaced it, now I’m stuck with it.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/99Necromancers on 2026-03-07 14:49:11+00:00.

Yesterday my gf asked me how my day was and for the first time in our relationship I had no idea how to respond. I work for a production company that produces reality tv. It's usually lifestyle and cooking shows, but the slate for this year included a couple of projects that were a lot less family friendly. Like the current project I'm assigned to. It was described to me as a "doccie series that explored the lives of cam models." My job was basically to follow the crew and film behind the scenes content for social media. I informed my gf about the project, which created an awkward atmosphere between us because the thought of me working with cam models automatically made her feel uncomfortable. I assured her I was only gonna do my job just like everyone else on the team.

Fast forward to the end of day 1, aka yesterday. My gf wanted to know how my first day was filming cam models. I said it was exhausting. Lots of locations. Little time. Long day. My gf asked if anyone got naked. I said one of them did. My gf asked if it was a girl who got naked. I nodded. My gf asked how naked. I said naked naked. My gf said that must have been the worst part of my long day. I struggled to make her understand that whatever she was imagining was definitely not as sexy for the people who had to work their asses off for 12 hours. My gf sighed and said since I saw enough pussy for the day, I probably wouldn't mind not seeing hers at all. I actually did mind, but it made no difference at that moment. Sex was off the menu. Something tells me it's gonna be a long 3 weeks.

Tl:dr Got a job filming cam models for a reality tv show and now my gf feels threatened.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Feisty-Ad276 on 2026-03-07 09:50:12+00:00.

Hi Reddit!

A lot has happened since my original post last July

(https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/s/aun5tjuTrw)

I’m not hopeful a lot of people remember me but I wanted to update to let you know what’s happened since then!

(This is going to be long sorry)

So I broke up with my boyfriend of 6 years ‘Tom’ after all this happened because you all gave me the reality check I needed to leave him after this whole shitshow unfolded. We went no contact and it was the hardest thing I’ve ever experienced in figuring out how to live without being with him (don’t worry I had the cats) and I truly only made it through with the support of friends and family showing up in ways that I never imagined. I’ve never been so broken but so loved at the same time.

On the 24th of October (3 months post breakup) I got a call from his mother that he had been taken to hospital by ambulance 2 days prior after having a seizure at work and he was asking for me. I let her know I appreciated the update but I was living 3 hours away from where they were and wouldn’t be dropping everything to see him right now but that I hoped he was okay.

She then told me he had a (benign) tumor in his frontal lobe which was discovered after he was brought in which was being removed in emergency surgery and that I should be there for him. I told her no.

On December 17th Tom turned up to my house (I was living with my family) and was refusing to leave until I saw him. I went out the front and he explained that he wasn’t himself in July and that the tumour had been affecting his decision making/emotional regulation and to please just give him a chance.

So we went for dinner that night.

And I fell in love with him all over again.

He was exactly the man I had loved all these years and there was no hint of the man who belittled me over a $300 dress while he wore a $40 button up and jeans. But that one night didn’t change everything for me, we still weren’t together but now we weren’t no contact.

We started texting, and then calling almost daily and it was like nothing had happened when we spoke. He had kept asking me to come home to him and I said no every time… almost.

I went ‘home’ to him on February 6th under the guise of getting the last of my things and to say goodbye to the house I called home for so long, but a few days being back home I realised I didn’t want to leave and that I wanted to try again. I stayed there for the weekend and on the 8th when I went to leave I kissed him, and then some 👀

We started dating again, and everything has been wonderful. His health is going well and he is exactly the man I knew before. He tells me I’m the most beautiful woman when I’m in my sweats on the couch, he packs me lunch for work, he takes me out to dinner ‘just to show the world how lucky he is’. He’s the love of my life and last weekend I officially moved back into our house.

Last night he took me to our old favourite Italian restaurant and asked me if I would marry him, I said yes.

I was wearing dirty jeans and a sweater and he was in his sweats and a t shirt. It. Was. Perfect.

So basically love is real and I’m getting married.

Sorry reddit I know this probably isn’t the update you wanted, but we’re happy now and hopefully this is my last update!

Love you all x

TLDR: I broke up with my boyfriend, went no contact and moved away, he had a brain tumour removed then he spent 4 months trying to get me back. He showed up at my door, we start dating again and got engaged yesterday

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/throwawaysedd1 on 2026-03-07 07:41:40+00:00.

I've been talking to this girl who I met at a coffee shop. At first, she said she wasn't looking for a relationship, but she was pretty receptive to talking to me. We texted each other back and forth for a bit for a couple days, and her tone changed to more fun and maybe even flirty.

Now we get to the FU: I start with a joke referencing earlier about how she took forever to reply and use that to message her, saying I'll be back from the gym to reply late to her too. She replies positively to the joke, and says she'd "wait for me even if it takes many hours". I'm thinking there's a tone shift there, and I honestly thought that was cute. My first message back was "Finished the gym :D told you I'd be back. You still waiting on me or what?" But I didn't feel satisfied with that message, so I went to edit it to "Just got back :D followed through lol. Ngl you saying you'd wait for me was kinda cute." Then, edited it two more times, putting in emphasis on how long she was willing to wait for me.

Anyways, after making these edits, I looked around online for how text edits from Android to Iphone work, and apparently they'll show up as additions to the previous edit, not as an override to the previous message. So, in other words, from her end it's likely she sees all the edits I've made. And she hasn't responded yet. All that build up to a nice text conversation now probably became cringey/embarrassing and maybe creepy. So yeah I don't know what to do lol. It's not like there was a likely chance things could've turned romantic, but now not sure if there's a way to salvage this.

TL;DR: edited texts to a girl with an iphone from an android with changes to indicate how I thought she was cute, not realizing each edit was probably showing up as a new message on her phone.

Edit: She said "I didn't expect to get the same message three times lol", so confirms she got the edits. But turns out it wasn't a big deal, I just said "Lmaoo not me exposing all my drafts *crying emoji* I was editing it and didn't know you'd get every version lol. The sentiments the same tho, your message was kinda cute tbh". Then we kept texting each other back and forth, with me making jokes and her saying how funny I am and making her smile. So all's well now lol

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Acceptable_Onion_253 on 2026-03-07 01:31:18+00:00.

For some context, I am a recent grad who just started actively applying for jobs. I managed to land my very first interview invite for an accounting role, and I was absolutely terrified. I was so scared of the technical rounds (VLOOKUPs, journal entries, pivot tables) and those annoying behavioral "tell me about a time" questions.

yesterday i posted on r/careeradvice freaking out about my very first accounting interview. i was terrified of the technical rounds and behavioral questions.

I wanted this job so badly, so I spent the entire night locking myself in my room. I researched the hell out of the company's business model. I used an AI mock interview tool I found online to practice my STAR method answers over and over again until I stopped stuttering and sounding like a nervous wreck.

Fast forward to today. The interview actually goes flawlessly. The first 40 minutes are a total breeze. They hit me with the technical questions, and I am completely chill. I nail the behavioral questions perfectly. The senior accounting manager interviewing me is literally nodding, smiling, and seems genuinely impressed. I am internally screaming with joy, thinking "holy crap, I am actually getting this job."

Then comes the very end of the Zoom call. The vibe is great. He leans back, smiles warmly, and asks the final question:

"So, the starting salary for this position is around $55k. Does that align with your expectations?"

and guess what? my brain just completely short-circuited.

I have never negotiated a professional salary in my life. I haven't even had a real adult job yet. The adrenaline drops, sheer panic sets in, and instead of using a normal, functioning adult response (like "Yes, that sounds reasonable" or literally anything else), I look this senior manager dead in the eyes through the webcam and say:

"Um, I think so, but I will need to go and ask my mom first. i'll let her decide it for me"

The silence that followed was deafening. It felt like an eternity. His smile instantly vanished into a look of pure confusion and pity. He literally blinked twice, picked up his pen, wrote something down on his notepad, and just said, "...okay. Well, we will be in touch." The Zoom call ended exactly 30 seconds later.

I am currently hiding undr my blankets, questioning my entire existence. The preparation helped me beat the technicals, but clearly, there is no amount of practice in the world that can cure my sheer stupidity when put on the spot.

Is there any chance they just think I was joking or being quirky? Will I get the position or am I completely cooked?

TL;DR: I perfectly executed my very first professional accounting interview, but when the hiring manager asked if the $55k starting salary was okay, I panicked and told him I needed to ask my mom first. He immediately lost his smile, ended the call, and I'm pretty sure I nuked my chances.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Impossible_Dig_1860 on 2026-03-06 16:06:48+00:00.

This actually happened years ago but I randomly remembered it today. I was around 12 and my parents went out to visit relatives, so I stayed home alone for the evening. It wasn’t a big deal because I had done that before. I was just in my room on my laptop with headphones on playing some game.

After a while I heard a knock somewhere in the house. It wasn’t loud, just a couple taps, so I thought maybe I imagined it or it was just normal house noises. A few minutes later it happened again, three slow knocks. That’s when I got up and went to check the front window that looks out to the yard. The porch light was on but there was nobody there and the gate was still closed. I stood there for maybe 20 seconds looking outside and then just went back to my room thinking it was nothing.

Maybe a minute later I heard knocking again but this time it sounded way closer. That’s when it kinda clicked in my head that it wasn’t the front door at all. It was my bedroom window. Just three quiet taps on the glass right behind me. I remember freezing for a second because the curtains were closed and I couldn’t see outside, and I really didn’t want to open them either. I just stood there staring at the curtain. After a few seconds I heard someone walking on the gravel outside the house like they were leaving.

I didn’t check the window and I didn’t go outside. I just turned the light off and sat in my room until my parents came back later. The next morning I looked outside and there were muddy shoe prints right under my window.

Still no idea who that was.

TL;DR I thought someone was knocking on the front door while I was home alone as a kid but it turned out someone was actually tapping on my bedroom window instead.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/HopefulForFilm on 2026-03-05 21:53:22+00:00.

Obligatory this didn’t happen today.

Several years ago I started getting terrible sore throats in the winter. The first time it happened, I assumed I had caught strep throat because it hurt so badly. I got a doctor to prescribe antibiotics without a test because I was in the middle of working 70 hour weeks and had no time to go in, so got the prescription via telehealth because I had all the symptoms, down to white spots on the back of my throat (heavily not recommended, do not take antibiotics unless you’ve tested positive for something treatable by antibiotics). I take the meds, the sore throat goes away.

Until a week or two later, it comes back. Go in for a test, test negative, doctors kinda shrug and tell me it should go away on its own. And it does. Until it comes back. All winter, I’m in a cycle of being sick for at least a week at a time with a sore throat. Makes it hard to eat, sleep, forget about exercising or socializing.

And then spring hits and it clears up, and I forget about it.

Next winter rolls around, I’m sick again. When I get sick I start taking photos of the back of my throat showing huge white masses all along my tonsils to show the doctors when I can get appointments.

At some point, in and amongst the various doctors appointments, there starts to be mention of post-nasal drip (mucus from my nose going down my throat and irritating it). I’m prescribed a nasal spray that’s described to me as steroids. I take it a few times, but get scared of shooting steroids up my nose every day, so I abandon it when my throat gets better and don’t start it again the next time I get sick.

I spend two more winters basically out of commission with these constant sore throats.

This year, when I got my first sore throat at the start of the winter, I decided enough is enough, I’m getting this fixed this year even if it means getting my tonsils out. I book in with a telehealth practitioner to get a referral to an ENT, and he asks about the nasal spray I had tried years earlier. He actually explains to me this time that I won’t build tolerance or become dependent on it and gets me to try it for a month to see if it helps.

I didn’t get a single sore throat. After a month I booked a follow up and he said I could stay on it until the spring, then go off it when my nose stops running from the cold and get back in it next winter. For the first time in years I haven’t lost my whole life the entire winter. It feels amazing.

Hoping this post helps someone because I scoured the internet trying to figure out what was wrong with me and something like this could have saved me a lot of suffering

TL;DR: if your throat recurrently hurts, ask your doctor about the possibility of it being post-nasal drip. And if a doctor prescribes you a medication and you’re worried about it, actually ask your doc questions instead of just not taking it

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/[deleted] on 2026-03-06 06:06:21+00:00.

Had a late night revelation.

I was awake at 4am, as per usual, and I stumbled across the productivity sub.

So as anyone would, I spent multiple hours being an unproductive asshat, while I was reading productivity posts.

Thought I was Productive Langer McGee himself, feeling proud of myself more and more every post I gazed my glazed eyes upon.

Eventually, I decided to delete all my social accounts, since I was a changed person now, obviously.

And this person I now was, had no time to waste on these useless social media apps.

Well a few hours later, I discovered that being productive wasn't for me, and I reactivated almost every single account.

The only problem was, I couldn't reactive my reddit account.

So now I'm stuck looking like I just fell directly out of the ass of Elon musk, like his other AI robots.

And who wants an Elon musk anal robot posting in their sub? No one. Absolutely no one.

Except this sub, cause this sub has pretty much no standards.

But for fuck sake, what was I was thinking?

Most productive thing I did this week was take a shit.

TL;DR: the productivity subreddit is a dangerous place for imbeciles, such as myself

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Suitable-Commercial3 on 2026-03-06 05:32:05+00:00.

While completing the check-in process with Ryanair (as with most airlines), it keeps showing you pages trying to get you to pick a seat, an insurance, a car rental, etc. On top of that, it also gives you the option to do the same for the return flight, without letting you know until you try to do it that you need to select a seat to actually complete it. As a consequence, I had to restart the whole process again.

Finally, it seems like I got confused by one of these screens that try to hide the buttons as much as possible. I thought I had completed the process and closed the app. 10 hours later and only less than 5 minutes after the check in closes, I finally found out that TIFU and I had no boarding pass.

In the end, I managed to find a replacement flight and I "only" lost 400€ and about 6 hours of my trip. I don't remember the last time I felt this stupid.

TL;DR: I didn't actually complete the check in for my flight because I got confused by the multiple advertisement pages that you get while doing it.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Cold_Wave_of_Dread on 2026-03-05 17:36:27+00:00.

Obligatory this happened eleven years ago, but still haunts me to this day. Also, I'm on mobile, in case formatting is wonky.

    My family and I were spending one of our last days before moving out of state at a Gattitown entertainment center. There was bumper cars, arcade games, and way too many little children running around. None of it appealed to grumpy, antisocial, teenage me. I just wanted to get out of there as soon as possible, but I was bravely enduring it all.     My mother granted me the high honor of keeping an eye on my youngest sibling, who was about 6. I let her run around and enjoy herself for a while, but eventually I sensed that we would be leaving soon, and I needed to have her with me. So, without much of a glance, I reached out and grabbed what I thought was my little sister. Was the sight size and shape, after all.     I stood there, hating life, watching children run around screaming, and was only mildly aware that my sister was struggling furiously against me. So I tightened my grip, because I did not want to have her slipping away and running off. I'm not a runner, I'm not chasing a kid around an arcade. She kept struggling, and finally, I look down to scold her for trying to get away when we're about to leave, and—     Oh. That is not my sister. That is a stranger.     I let the poor girl go like her wrist was scorching hot, and didn't even have time to apologize before she was booking it across the entertainment center. Probably to run and tell her parents that someone just tried to kidnap her. I was instantly grateful we were leaving soon, and would also be moving out of state, because I was certain the law would be after me for that.

TLDR; I grabbed some random kid instead of my sister at a child's entertainment center and probably gave the poor thing trauma for life.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Appropriate-Nobody60 on 2026-03-05 21:57:31+00:00.

Today has been nightmare fuel for the rest of my life and I will never be the same man that I was before this morning.

Today’s FU started like any other morning. I got up, grabbed my work clothes from the fresh laundry and went to get ready for work. Now this would hardly be considered a mistake if not for the fact that this laundry was brought in from the line last night by my spouse. It’s been unusually warm this past week and as such more insects etc have started roaming about. This dear readers is where I made my fatal mistake.

I can admit that I am not a bug person and I’m not ashamed of that. But when I put on my pants and then immediately felt an intense pain on my butt cheek I screamed. Both out of pain as it seemed to be getting worse and also because I was certain I had just been bit by something.

My dear spouse the brave man that he is, came to my rescue as I desperately asked for him to check my pants as I thought I had been bitten by something. Sure enough in my pants was an incredibly angry WASP!

Turns out that when the laundry was brought in last night this incredibly angry asshole had decided that my work pants would make a lovely place to bed down for the night. By not shaking out my clothes like I normally do, I had inadvertently left him in my pants to terrorize me.

It’s been hours now and it still hurts to sit. I may never wear pants again.

TL:DR Didn’t shake out laundry from outside and got stung on the ass by an angry wasp

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Aggressive_Belt2023 on 2026-03-05 19:17:41+00:00.

I have been struggling with some gut issues, etc. So a friend convinced me to try the carnivore diet. (if this diet works for you then awesome, we are all different, this isn’t a knock on the diet itself.) So proceed with the meats and eggs. Breakfast, lunch dinner. It all seems to be going ok as possible until the 4th day when I realize I haven’t pooped in well, 4 days. I figure it’s the new diet, it will adjust. 3 more days go by and I’m getting increasingly uncomfortable. I have pounds of fermenting meats in my intestines and it feels like it. I’m releasing horrid gas that smells like it. Well now it’s been a week. I figure this isn’t good, right?

So I head to the store. I have zero experience with laxatives and I’m too embarrassed to ask anyone, so I google. So I throw in some kids dulcolax (good to start gentle, right?) some glycine suppositories because I read on Reddit (thanks Reddit) that these are gentle and effective, some adult Dulcolax, some prune juice (classic choice) and some dried apricots for good measure because I remember when I was a kid these made me poop like no tomorrow.

So the first day I pop a couple kids dulcolax. Nothing. A few hours later I decide let’s try the glycine. Nothing. Later that day I try more kids dulcolax and another glycine suppository. Nada. I realize at this point pooping has consumed my every thought.

It’s been 8 days now, the longest in my life really, and I feel so bloated, nauseous and full of poop I contemplate going to the doctor. Instead I figure why not throw the rest of the arsenal at the problem. I take a couple more kids Dulcolax, I pound a can of prune juice, pop two adult dulcolax, and then later that day eat a couple handfuls of dried apricots. When nothing happens after a couple hours, another can of prune juice down the hatch and one more Dulcolax because why not?

As I lay down in bed my stomach starts making noises. Noises that no stomach should make. Noises that perhaps only a demon possessed animal of some sort might make. And the gurgling. I have never heard or experienced the likes of it. I toss and turn and wish I could turn back time. I can feel that something is going to happen, something intense, and I’m terrified.

At some point I fall into a fitful sleep. I dream of being chased by animals making strange noises. I wake up twice in a cold sweat and try to get something to release in the bathroom. Instead I throw up. At this point rolling cramps are hitting me and every time I go sit in the toilet my legs go numb and I feel lightheaded. Yet, nothing.

I somehow fall into a brief fitful sleep, and I wake up feeling like a hot knife is twisting its way through my guts. I run to the bathroom and trip over my very confused and concerned dog and stumble the rest of the way into the bathroom.

I plop down. And I feel something literally moving its way out. I’m giving birth to something and it’s unnatural and large. To spare the details it decides to get stuck painfully right before freedom and I die a little on the inside. Finally it releases with so much force behind it I splash myself with toilet water.

Then the fun begins. That scene in dumb and dumber after he gets dosed with the laxative? That seems mild compared to what I go through. For over an hour it’s like an intermittent waterfall of the worst kind. I’m sweating, hunched over with rolling cramps as something unholy unleashes itself over and over.

After an hour and a half I stumble to the bed and collapse. I chug some Gatorade, thankfully I had a bottle, so very thankful, and I manage to pass out from exhaustion.

Until two hours later I am tortured by another miserable and violent experience that leaves me weak and questioning how these things can be available over the counter for us stupids to unleash upon ourselves. This experience repeats itself 2 more times until at the end I swear it’s just water. It can’t be anything else at this point. I’ve literally become a human fountain of the worst kind.

It’s the next day now and I am still making trips to the bathroom every couple hours. My whole abdomen is sore. I will never question the benefits of fiber again. And next time god forbid I will have some patience instead of chucking the kitchen sink at it.

TL;DR Laxatives had a delayed effect and I learned my lesson.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/spidermom4 on 2026-03-05 16:53:01+00:00.

So technically not today. My daughter will be 7 soon. But we named her Marie. (And yes, I know that is your middle name or your mom's middle name or your sisters middle name. She gets that a lot.) Anyway, we weren't planning on giving her a nickname at all. But my 2 year old twin nieces at the time had a funny way of talking and would call her, "Baby Murray." which we all thought was insanely funny and cute. And "Baby Murray" stuck. Fast forward a few years and she demands we drop the baby. But I start to realize around this time she is exclusively referring to herself as "Murray." and cannot hear the difference between Marie and Murray. So I start making an effort to say "Marie" exclusively. A few more years later and she is in kindergarten and I start realizing she still calls herself Murray, and all her classmates call her Murray too. So I start attempting to get her to say it properly, but it backfires because now when she is saying her name she puts the emphasis on the first syllable. So she introduces herself as, "MUH-rie" which always has people looking at me confused like, "Wait, what is her name?" And she still cannot hear the difference between Marie and Murray. So either it is "MUH-rie" or "Murray." I tried explaining emphasis of Marie is on the "rie" and she just looked at me confused.

TL;DR I named my daughter Marie nickname Murray, and she can't hear the difference and just calls herself Murray.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/slipknotsnuffbunnie on 2026-03-05 04:34:53+00:00.

TIFU by buying a couch on Facebook marketplace, now at first glance you would think this one of those Facebook Marketplace horror stories but it’s actually not.

I saw this couch and absolutely fell in love with it, I’ve been searching for a couch since I moved into my new first apartment, I messaged the seller and they were great, even gave me a discount because I had to drive an hour and 20 mins away. So I spent $180 month couch which is actually a steal.. but the problem is…I hate it lol.

Look I’ve never bought a couch before, I couldn’t even begin to tell you what was going on in my head when I bought it other than OO PINK PRETTY, it’s in amazing condition but it’s honestly so uncomfortable and.. it’s a love seat.. not even a full couch. But I can say the pictures do make it look bigger!!

And that’s not even the worst part, my drive there, cost 2x more than the couch so not only did I make a very very very dumb investment, I spent more effort getting it than it was worth lol. I’m feeling very dumb right now lol

That being said, I think I shouldn’t ever be trusted to ever buy my own furniture again.

TL;DR i bought a couch I hate and now I’m loathing over it lol

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/muva30 on 2026-03-05 02:09:03+00:00.

We have been going through so much with my 3 year olds health. At his appointment today , I received some news that we will now have to travel another hour & a half to a hospital for observations because his blood cell count is high. Between this, his seizures and try to afford basics like food and gas , I broke down in-front of her after she told us the news.

I deeply apologized and I think she understood. She gave me a hug and told me it’s going to work out. At first she seemed scared but I just explained how much stress I am under and she didn’t deserve any of that. I can’t visit our local food bank for another week ( we are extremely low) , all these appointments are sucking the life out of me & now I have to find a way to scrounge up enough gas money for his appointment. I am drowning and can’t seem to crawl out of this. I’m trying my best & it’s humiliating working long hours for nothing. I feel like a terrible human and mother.

TL;DR : I took my frustration out on a nursing assistant at my baby’s appointment with everything going on with his health. I deeply apologized to her.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/HalfADozenOfAnother on 2026-03-05 02:08:29+00:00.

It was a cold rainy day. I was off work so I decided to take my kid to school instead of having her ride the bus. I drop my kid off at school and decide today is a good day for potato soup. My family loves my potato soup. Stop at rhe market get the ingredients I need and head home. Saute up some onions and garlic. Chop up some potatoes and get the crockpot fired up. Enjoyed the smell all day. Just before my wife got home I cooked up some bacon. Sliced up some chives. Warmed up some bread. Put the final touches on the soup. Taste it to make sure it was tasted good. Nope not good at all. Taste like hot potato ice cream. Realization hits me. I know what I did. I open the fridge. Look at yogurt. Fucking Greek vanilla yourt.

TL;DR: potato soup with vanilla yogurt isn't edible

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/skytreegrasss on 2026-03-04 18:17:55+00:00.

for reference i’m 25M just posting here because it is pretty life changing

for the past five years my fatigue has been so bad it feels like my life has revolved around when i’m going to be able to nap next. i had to take a nap on my lunch break every single day; even when it was -10° outside i’d wait for my car to warm up so i could get 30 minutes of sleep in before facing the rest of my shift

even directly after 12 or 14 hours of sleep i would think “man i could definitely go to bed right now”. i also gained like 20-30 lbs because i couldn’t get a gym routine down.

i’ve had anxiety and depression pretty bad in the past and a lot of the symptoms are consistent (as fatigue, memory loss, and depression are symptoms of vitamin D deficiency) so i just thought “well fuck, it’s really hitting me hard huh” and did fucking nothing about it

also, i think my fucking bones were getting brittle. every time i get up i can feel a deep bone ache in my hands or feet or knees or any part that sticks out really

anyways i finally got bloodwork done a couple months ago. i don’t often go to the dr because i’m chinese (lol) and i just don’t go in unless i’m actively dying or something. but my partner finally convinced me

the normal range for vitamin d levels is between 30-100 ng/mL, with deficiency being under 20, and severe deficiency being under 12. dawg my level was 9 ng/mL.

so i saw this and think hmm that seems low! and then my doctor says yeah so this is probably it dude! heres a shitton of vitamin D for the next eight weeks!

and HERES WHERE I REALLY FUCKED UP, i thought i had taken labs before so i looked up my past results from years and years ago and the level was EIGHT. 8 ng/mol. i don’t know why i didn’t follow up with this, i guess i must have thought it wasn’t that bad

so i have had a severe deficiency for AT LEAST FIVE YEARS that i could have fixed ages ago. just the time loss makes me so sad and angry because i’ve sacrificed so much of my life and my hobbies/interests to sleeping all the goddamn time

anyways, today marked the last 50,000 iu vitamin D pill that i’ve taken over the past eight weeks. and my fucking life has changed! i don’t feel like ass all the time!!! i can wake up in the morning after eight hours of sleep and stay awake the whole day!!!!

i can’t express how life changing it’s been to get some energy back. it was like i was living partially asleep for my whole life

i’ve already made a workout and meal plan for the upcoming week. i just generally feel so hopeful for my future when i think about how many things i can do in a day now. another good part is that i’m relatively young so hopefully the bone density thing will resolve in a year or so

anyways GET YOUR LABS DONE!!!! and take your vitamins, especially if you live in a northern area

TL;DR i lost years of my life to sleep because i thought the fatigue from my vitamin d deficiency was just depression

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/PercentageNo9270 on 2026-03-04 14:09:15+00:00.

This happened DURING a job interview. Everything that could go wrong did go wrong. My computer froze and my audio lagged so I tried muting and unmuting, plugging and unplugging the wifi. It was a full mess right as I’m trying to look competent and hireable.

While scrambling to fix it (and thinking I was muted), I muttered “I swear, I’m gonna kill myself if this doesn’t work.” And it wasn’t literal or serious. It was one of those exaggerated frustration that things people say when something is testing their patience.

And as unlicky as I am today, the interviewer heard it. Later in the conversation, they brought it up and said they’re wary of hiring people with mental illnesses especially those who have suicidal thoughts. I immediately clarified. I told them it was just a figure of speech that I didn’t mean it literally and that I don’t have suicidal thoughts. I apologized for the wording and explained it was just stress from the tech issues.

But they seemed set in their view as they only repeated what they initially said. I might have just thrown my resume right in the trash.

TL;DR: Made a frustrated “I’m gonna kill myself” joke during a glitchy job interview thinking I was muted. I wasn’t. Clarified it was just a figure of speech, but interviewer seemed set on seeing it as a mental health red flag.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/scubahana on 2026-03-04 13:13:41+00:00.

This actually started about a year ago, but today I am reminded of the consequences of my own actions.

I was in the local thrift store and saw a kind of pretty shirt. It was black, with one shoulder, and a nice but tasteful zigzag across the front in glitter.

IN. GLITTER.

It's been a long while since I've encountered anything with glitter that I liked, so clearly with decades of separation I forgot what a terrible, terrible idea this really is. It was also only 75kr (about €10), so clearly the Devil spat in my eye when I was mesmerised by the sparkles.

I wore it shortly after to something. I don't even remember what or if it was anything fancy even. But when I took off my sweater, it came out looking FABULOUS. And I don't mean that in a 'yay!' kind of way. Glitter was everywhere.

I put the top back into my closet, thinking I would just use it for specific occasions, but then a few days later my son came to me and showed me his now FABULOUS Minecraft shirt. The glitter had clung to whatever else I was wearing that day and then was loosed into the laundry load. And the next. And the next.

When the seasonal wardrobe came around, the demon shirt was put away to hopefully be forgotten about. That was in September.

Fast forward to today, six months later. The weather is a bit better than the insane winter we've had, so I grabbed one of my workout tops that has been suffering from depression, being forgotten in my closet throughout the Dark Months.

And guess... WHAT.

Looks like the Ides of March came a little early for me, but at least I look spectacular?

TL; DR: Don't buy glittery anything. It will haunt you past your grave.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/chronically-iconic on 2026-03-03 20:30:01+00:00.

I'm laughing about the situation, because it's actually stale mate. To make it easy to digest, I have to tell it in chapters

Chapter 1: The Move

2 weeks ago me and my new housemate moved into a house. It's a massive place in a city in Europe(keeping it vague for reasons), and it was cheap because it's right next to the train tracks (we have double glazed windows and we still hear t) even so, we love it here an wouldn't change a thing.

chapter 2: the cintract

Prior to moving, The rental agency asked if we have pets. The landlord has always allowed pets apparently (which is rare) but we felt like it could have been a setup to deny us a contract so we didn't tell them. They did, however, put a clause in the contract that says we can get pets in the future, we just need to ask the landlord for written consent. By that time it would have been so awkward to tell them we actually do have cats, and we decided to wait 2 months and then make up a story about a relative leaving the country and needing to leave their cats or whatever.

chapter 3: an intruder..almost

We called the landlord and asked him to asses a few broken things to repair, we agreed that he can come into the house, but only if we're there. Neither my housemate nor I could take time off work, so I emailed to defer the visit. When we got home, the broken shelf was fixed and a few broken things had clearly been moved around

Chapter 4: the cats

One of my cats is scared of everything and hides from any strangers. My other cat, however, has the survival instinct of a peanut and will follow anyone home (hes not allowed outside for that reason) he would have almost certainly greeted my landlord at the door and purred while doing it. Even if he didn't see the cat, we have a litter box, toys and food bowls.

chapter 5: the silence

They never responded to my email from yesterday asking to defer the visit but I assumed they had seen it. They haven't contacted us at all today (they were supposed to be here early in the morning) and I'm assuming they would have called me straight away. Problem is, it's illegal for him to enter if we requested he only comes when we are home, and we told him not to come. It's stale mate, he can't tell us that he's evicting us for having a cat because he would have to confess to breaching the contract and law. We can't tell him we have a cat yet. So we just sit in this awkward silence, not sure what will happen

TL;DR My landlord for my new house entered the property without us present, we requested he came to help with some repairs and agreed that he could come today. We (me and my housemate) did email to defer his visit saying that we both had to go to work and couldn't get time off. Also, We have cats and didn't tell him. He never responded to the email, but he clearly let himself in and repaired one of the shelves. He would have seen my one cat and the litter box. It's illegal for him to enter the property and we've also both breached the contract. He didn't contact us at all today and we haven't heard from him. He can't tell us he knows about the cats, and we can't tell him that we want to get pets and in our contract it says we can but only with permission.

I'm laughing about it.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/r0s3_sh4mp00 on 2026-03-04 02:46:50+00:00.

This happened 20 mins ago, and I am still sad and scared though it ended chill. I (16F) am currently applying to some research program for high schoolers at my local university. Two references are required for the application. So I pulled up to a dental clinic where I shadowed for 60 ish hours in total last summer and requested the dentist to fill in the reference form for my application.

He gladly agreed and started to write good qualitied response to the form questions. Everything had been going well. I was highkey excited to imagine how good my application will read to those admission ppl. After 10-15 mins of writing, the dentist is done. So he asked me to check and edit any response.

I started to check and fix things up. Several minutes later, I was done. Here camed the part where I fucked up:

I hit the submit button before asking the dentist.

2 secs later he got SOOOO pissed off at me. He scolded me and even said “im calling them to decline the reference”.

I froze. My heart dropped to the bottom of an ice lake. I apologized 5 times, if not, more and called myself stupid. He calmed down and opened the email receipt of the response.

I stood by, silent. You know the feeling of sky collapsing but u r too numb to feel anything right at that momet? That’s exactly that feeling.

The dentist took a biref look over the edited part and finally decided to keep it. (No more declining yay). At last, he told me to remember my lesson and wished me the best in getting the position.

Handshakes. Walked out. I started to cry when I got home cuz im genuinely ashamed and regretted for fucking up a great relation with the dentist whom I shadowed for 60 hours. I just feel like a bad perosn who has zero respect to others. Idek how Im gonna be able to greet him when I bump into him after school (the dental clinic is super close to my school and home).

Big Sigh.

TL;DR: I asked someone to fill in reference form for me. He left me the PC to make edits, but then I hit the submit button before letting him double check.

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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/emily0817 on 2026-03-04 00:49:52+00:00.

my bf and I were on our way back from a friend's birthday party and on the way back he said he wanted to stop at CVS for something. I was already 3 beatboxes in, and had been hitting my cart like a vape for past hour. I think to myself "oh nice, I kinda have to pee so maybe I can go in and use the bathroom." thinking absolutely nothing was wrong with this idea. I'm beyond messed up at this point, and I can barely keep my head up or eyes open, and honestly should've just waited the extra five minutes till we got back home (right down the road).

we pull in and I'm slapping myself on the face to wake myself up and act normal, since I'm literally high and going into a pharmacy. as we walk to the door, I notice a cardboard cut out of a man sweeping the floor. I see nothing wrong with a cardboard cut out of a man sweeping the floor in cvs, and just stare right in its eyes as we continue our way inside. once he passes the door I heard an employee say "hey what's up?" and looked in his direction when I also entered. it was a regular real man holding a broom and sweeping the floor, but I don't register it's a person until he lifts the broom off the floor. and boy when he did, I probably jumped back five feat out of shock and genuine terror. he gave me a really mean face and said "is there a problem?" and my boyfriend said "no, sorry she just needed to use the bathroom" and dragged me away.

he told me to go straight to the bathroom and go to the car, and I could tell he was upset, and I thought it was at the employee. I listened to what he said, and when he got back in, he goes, "you're not doing this again." he said that I wasn't going to get drunk and high anymore because I let my "true self show." then he said that he couldn't see himself dating a racist and I needed to fix my behavior or he'd be gone... when my boyfriend went to check out, the man (who he always sees up there) told him not to bring me back if I was going jump out of the fear of seeing a black person.

the man was black and thought I was being racist. I'm still too messed up to take anything seriously, and I tried to hard to explain to him why I was laughing so much and eventually managed to tell him I didn't think he was a real man and thought he was cutout. my boyfriend repeated back to me what I told him, and the whole time I was noticing his mouth crack more and more into a smile out of disbelief and relief. I was howling the whole way home as he kept telling me that he's not letting me out of the car next time I get like that and he's explaining the whole situation to the guy next time he sees him while trying to still act upset even though I could see the smile on his face. we both just laughed about it again an hour ago.

TL;DR: I went into a CVS drunk and high and thought the black employee at the front of the store was a cardboard cut out. he accidentally scared me when he moved, and thought I was a racist which lead to my boyfriend threatening our relationship until I explained.