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When I was a kid, I remember seeing clouds of them in the school field when we went out to play. There used to be so many that they would cover your windshield. For the last few years I have hardly seen any around. Today, I only saw a single solitary bug lazily flying through the air.

I suspect the rapidly changing climate is the cause but, I guess I feel a bit of shock at realizing and reflecting on the fact that this is happening right at home.

I don't know how else to phrase this but hear me out

Is Family Guy funny? 98% of the time, no. There are a couple genuinely funny bits tossed in here and there but the average episode of Family Guy is some weird, uninteresting plot that keeps getting interrupted every 2 minutes with some cutaway gag that usually involves some form of bigotry/violence against a minority group or a crude joke no one over the age of 15 finds funny. Sometimes there will be a sort of funny gag about how your local pizza place makes the worst "salad" or that one bit about Pat Tillman which was really funny, but I can't imagine anyone older than the age of 16 saying "yeah, time to turn on the TV and watch Family Guy!"

Literally who is the target audience for this? This show has been going on for nearly a quarter century now and stopped being good after like three years and yet it still keeps getting renewed. I don't know anyone who watches it. I couldn't even imagine what a Family Guy fan would even look like. Like, if I walked in on someone sitting on the couch at their house and they were unironically tuned into Family Guy, I'd be thinking "holy shit is this guy for real?". But apparently, considering how much air time and ratings this show gets, there are millions of people out there watching what's basically the equivalent of a dollar store joke book written by your racist uncle that nobody wants to invite to thanksgiving. Everyone knows about it, it's not funny, nobody yet also millions watch it? I can make Family Guy references and people get what I'm talking about because we've all fucking seen it and nobody likes it. It's just this white noise TV show that you just use to fill space. It might as well just a blank screen that read [Insert TV program here] because it just feels like filler. You can just put Family Guy in literally anything and it somehow just... fits? It's the TV show that you put on when no one actually wants to watch it. Remember like 6 years ago when "they added Peter Griffin to Fortnite" was a dumb meme? It was a dumb meme, and then they made it real because after it was funny, then it became real and now it's just like. Yep. They got Peter Griffin in Fortnite"

Family Guy isn't funny, but it's deeply funny in the metasense because of it's omnipresence and renown, clear attempt at humor, yet complete lack of anything approaching substance to say nor any coherent overarching message. Forget the average Family Guy viewer, who writes this shit. I genuinely can't imagine anyone who makes this show actually wants to write more Family guy, they just do it because they're Family Guy writers and that's what pays the bills. Didn't we have a post here like 3 days ago saying that Patrick Warburton and his mom really want to quit the show? It's even more incongruous because there's even a handful of times where they TRY to have some kind of moving message or deeper themes, like the one episode where Brian and Stewie are trapped in the bank vault all night and Brian opens up about his suicidality and alcoholism and there's either very few or no cutaway gags. But of course, it's Family Guy so they can't actually do something interesting or good without fucking it up so of course they write in a joke about how "haha brian has to like stewie's poop off his ass"

I don't know how to put it into words other than I'm laughing at a clown that isn't funny. It's trying to be funny, it isn't, and THAT'S what's funny. Come to think of it, that's basically what I've always thought about Big Chungus and why I ran that as a pfp/username here for like 3 years. It's the comedic equivalent to "Ceci n'est pas une pipe". "This is not a joke", yet it clearly presents as one

As a result, all I can do whenever I see Peter Griffin in literally anything is just laugh because it's just not funny. I can make myself cackle by doing a bad Peter Griffin impression saying "Hey Lois" because shitposting about Family Guy is just what the fucking writing staff of that show does

every single one; when I see a shitty tel aviv influencer join the IDF, I look forward to them being exploded by heroic Hamas resistance fighters; I pray constantly for their violent death

Helping America abuse the global south and stop the spread of communist democracy. What a joke.

I'm proud that the only war my grandad fought in was the only war in which we were the good guys for once, WWII.

Here's to the brave people who fought against facsism.

Fuck imperial Japan

Fuck Nazi Germany

Fuck Zionist Israel

Fuck South Korea

Fuck the US anti-communist empire

Fun story about my Grandad during WW2. He was stationed on an island shooting down Imperial Japanese planes. Near the end of the war they had next to no supplies. Their clothes were even rotting. Then the Americans swooped in late in the war after the hard work was done, with a ton of supplies and money from war profiteering, and instead of sharing supplies with their allies during a fucking war, they charged huge amounts of money for them. Needless to say, my Grandad came back from the war hating the Americans as much as the Japanese.

Xi Jinping is also a dictator.

I was gaming with friends on Discord when the topic of China passingly came up and one guy started going off about how China and Russia are both socially backward authoritarian dictatorships and how China is communist in name only, oppresses its minority groups and no true socialist should support them.

Goddamnit. Have a tech company interview lined up on friday, but still. I was so goddamn excited about this.

Zoomers refuse to call and leave a voicemail but then send you a 3 minute voice message

Muh cis white boomer man burden waaaaa

I'm pretty partial to calling it the Model Why but I feel like name Panzer Jank is better at getting the message across verbally.

Last time I complained about snow it was just a light dusting of snow that melted in a few hours

The combination of full-on winter scenes with snow on the trees, birdsong and lots of daylight is trippy

Blandest fucking shit I've ever had lmao

I keep telling myself to be open-minded and try things and keep vindicating my gut feeling that things will suck

(or do choose to elaborate on if you want), I'll start:

Riichi mahjong is incredibly sexy

It's snowing on the 20th of April, this is BULLSHIT

Coldest spring since 1992

As a kid / early teenager at night I remember lying awake at night and feeling my whole body screech at me. It's indescribable, almost. As an adult, I have only felt this way again twice. Once in Egypt when I caught some kind of flu, it felt like electrodes running through my body. Come to think of it, it feels a lot like holding onto an electric fence. The other time was after a megadose of LSD, my body screeching, the world crashing againt me in waves, dipping in and out for hours, and there was that pain again.

Besides the pain, I could only think these words to try to understand how I was feeling: plastic, elastic, spastic. I think elastic because it was like my nerves were being stretched out and allowed to smack back into place, although now I type it out here I realise that is just drug induced psychosis.

Anyway, the feeling at the time was that this sensation of being pulled apart was insanely familiar, like it had at one point been with me every night of my life. I would like in bed and fidget about and stretch myself out and try to find any position at all that didn't hurt.

Wondering if just me or everyone else as well?

On one hand, hey, I'm doing that labor shit that gets me money to survive in this capitalist system... That's p nice (I guess).

On the other hand, I'm exhausted so:

oh you're freaking out about your life already?? how about a side of Pregnancy Scare??

I was 99% sure I wasn't pregnant before I got piss all over my hand trying to check, but it's a really fun little scientific activity to pee in a cup and on myself and then use a little dropper to sprinkle some on a test, so I didn't mind

haha jk I absolutely hated it

jfc

The doxing I'm talking about happened years ago, don't worry about that, everybody already went home on that, can't give any more information without redoxxing myself.

I accidentally noticed I was logged into imgur today, I don't use the website, so that's a surprise. I decided to wander an old album of random person shit that shouldn't be uploaded straight into NSA land (aka five eyes, imgur, etc.), but you know, facebook/insta is probably technically worse and I got a lot more there anyways.

I saw I had a random picture that could best be described as a horny prank photo, with my computer screen VERY VISIBLE AND READABLE in the background. I was curious about what the background details were on my computer, and then I noticed something very embarrassing. I had a windows download window open, and one of the files downloaded was a PDF with MY FULL NAME on on the filename, and MY UNIVERSITY's DOMAIN as the download source for the file.

I remember the historical context of how and why I shared this picture, I'm aware of like 100 online mostly anonymous people, any one of which may have kept a copy for who knows how long, but long enough to figure out how to punish me for such a dumb mistake. I think for this theory to work, they must have gone to uni with me or have met one of my classmates, but that would be hard to prove without DMing lots of acquaintances on fb/insta, but everyone I'm online friends with from uni is basically upgraded to sus right now, this person might even be trying to collect more things on me until the time is right for a round 2.

America delenda est.

These groups are hilarious. Four Our Future, In Union, Democracy for All, and now this new one I just joined with a name I forget.

They keep popping up with new names, but I am starting to get the feeling they are just the same entities laundering money or some shit. Even funnier, they are all anti union while canvassing (without saying so usually) for pro union candidates. In Union, of course, was the most aggressively anti union one I have been a part of. For Our Future had a union, but the hiring managers lied about the union and hoped people wouldn't find out. This new one I joined I swear is just Democracy for All with a different name.

I suspect these groups notice their employees trying to unionize. They realize it is a bad look when they fight a union while supporting a(n allegedly) pro union lib on the ballot. Then the next time they need to start canvassing they decide to have a new name so they can fight off the union again before shit gets real.

Thanks for reading my rant. This shit is infuriating and hard to track.

unrelated but Cheers to Stalin

This is why the theory of third world development & first world class consciousness evolved way past the point which our friends on twitter are beginning to reach.